Project Runway: Recycling Can Be A Bad Thing

This week’s Recycled Episode: “I will wear the winner’s outfit in the upcoming [insert event here]” Challenge!

Heidi tells the group they will next be designing for a high-powered, glamorous and professional woman. Blayne fears he’ll have to create a neon pantsuit for Hillary Clinton. Blayne’s funny, right? That’s good television, right? I hope you all think so.

At the workroom, Tim introduces Brooke Shields. Everyone (except Stella) looks genuinely delighted. Suede is so happy he forgets to use the third person, reminding us that Brooke did those Calvin Klein ads years ago. In case we don’t recognize her from 2008 on NBC’s “Lipstick Jungle.”

The designers must create an outfit for Brooke’s alter ego, which must be versatile enough to work from day-to-night. Bohemian chic to workplace flair is mentioned. I’m not sure, my eyes glazed over at the cross-promotion.

The designers will pitch ideas to Brooke, then work in teams of two based on Brooke’s six choices. Jerell surprises with his self-realization that after the Olympic challenge, he needs to listen to the criteria and design accordingly. Keith giggles at his sketches. Daniel insists he’s talented. Kelli likes leopard.

Brooke announces her favorites and also, that she will wear the winning outfit during Season Two. She chooses the designs of Keith (with Kenley), Korto (with Joe), Jerell (with Stella), Kelli (with Daniel), Terri (with Suede), and Blayne (with Leanne).

Blayne says he will not do just another dress. This should be interesting since he’s had some of the most boring designs ever. Not that that matters!

At the workroom, Tim announces that there is no immunity this week. Kelli has Daniel re-do a simple black skirt he’s ruined. Suede cuts Terri’s fabric against his better judgment and “jacks up” the design. He complains and whines enough that Terri is forced (hilariously) to say: “I don’t know what he’s packing, balls or vajayjay, but he needs to work that out. Because I ain’t got no babies, no one’s sucking on my titties. So please, man up.” And now I want Terri to win it all.

Tim Time. Tim loves Jerell’s color palette, and questions the transition to eveningwear in Kelli’s outfit. He raises an eyebrow at the giant sweet potato jacket Korto’s designed. Joe expresses concern also, much to Korto’s surprise, who reminds him that she has immunity. If he doesn’t like what she’s doing, he’d better say so, because she’s not going home.

Day Two. Kenley is offended by Daniel’s claim to a high-end aesthetic and Jerell is offended by Terri’s confidence. Leanne thinks Korto’s outfit looks horrible. Joe finally voices his concern about Korto’s immunity. Brilliant timing, Joe.

Runway!

Korto: Jacket looks great. Kelli: Leopard disaster. Jerell: Cool dress, prints. Keith: Nice dress, good transition. Terri: Great pant outfit. Blayne: Not innovative. I can buy that at Kohl’s right now.

Terri and Korto are safe. Brooke loves the mix of textures in Jerell’s dress, but worries about the zebra belt. Heidi thinks it’s cool and Kors declares “chic.” Kelli says hers is a sexy suit. Brooke laments the shape as “truly unfortunate” and it looks “cheap,” eliciting a “slutty slutty slutty” out of Kors. Nina questions their taste. Kelli admits she should’ve edited more but Kors says Daniel should’ve objected. Heidi asks of the two, who should go home. I’ll say now how disappointing it would be if Kelli goes home over Daniel. She’s much more talented and shown it, as opposed to Daniel’s Wonder Woman drinking dress. Kelli says Daniel, but Daniel claims he has impeccable and high-end taste. Laughter erupts from Kenley, which is pretty rude because she doesn’t explain when asked. On the other hand, it’s awesome because we know why she’s laughing, and she’s so right.

Brooke likes Keith’s dress and though Nina thinks it may be too cocktail, she loves it. Brooke thinks Blayne’s look is too casual and Nina tells him he didn’t listen to Brooke. Heidi says the model looks like “a woman who didn’t have a mirror and just grabbed whatever.” Or she bought it at Kohl’s. When asked, Blayne admits he should go home, and Leanne agrees.

Deliberation. Jerell nailed the shape and sense of power while being feminine. Keith’s looked unique, inspired, and classy. Kors sounds surprised when he says “sophisticated.” Kelli showed what Kelli liked, but Heidi says Daniel has never delivered anything special. Brooke calls Blayne “bratty,” and Nina called it “The Blayne Show.” Remember that.

Trot them back out and Keith wins! I liked Jerell’s better. Finally, Daniel is safe, and between Kelli and Blayne, Kelli goes home. Which is stupid because Kelli’s a far superior and more creative designer. But if you’ve been taking notes, you know that once again, good television trumps a better designer, so Blayne gets to stay. Holla at your boy.

Next week: Chris March! Drag Queens! A pterodactyl out of a gay Jurassic Park! Someone alert Steven Spielberg!