America’s Next Top Model: Natural Beauty

Hot off last week’s inexplicable win, Clark sincerely, and with not a drop of humility, interviews about her awesome photo on display, and that though she started out close to the bottom, she told herself to “go balls to the wall,” and the result is a winning photo.  She “politely” rubs it in to the other girls.  I can’t tell if I dislike her enough that I want her to go home immediately, or stick around so her hopes can get dashed even more, closer to the end.  Is that wrong?

Samantha laments her place in the bottom two, but she won’t take it personally and will stay positive (where’s Hannah and her beans?) to regain the top.  Marjorie and Analeigh discuss Marjorie’s intimidation problem, in that everyone and everything makes Marjorie uncomfortable and intimidated.  Marjorie falls back on cultural differences, because she’s not used to so many people with positive outlooks.

Joslyn calls her sister and talks about her frustration with her progress.  I begin to worry.  Spotlighting Joslyn this way is a bad sign for her future.

At a construction site, the girls are met by Paulina, who introduces a self-styling challenge.  The girls dress in oversized clothing and must use additional items to correct the fit for a commercial shoot.  Marjorie interviews that she doesn’t see the judges as people she would talk to, so it’s hard for her to act normally.  Because they’re the problem.  There are a few successes, but the worst are Sheena, Samantha, and Marjorie.  Marjorie’s upset with herself, and looks very embarrassed and awkward as Paulina critiques her.  When Paulina starts to announce the winner, she stops because Marjorie is near tears.

When Marjorie won’t explain why, the other girls assure Paulina it’s only nerves.  I’m tired of Marjorie all over again and this whole bit is barely five minutes long.  Paulina takes pity, and explains the European mentality to reject yourself before everyone else can reject you.  Which sounds a lot like me as a teenager, but I’m not European, so … whatever, Paulina.  Marjorie, however, feels comforted, because “the European mentality is not a positive one, in American terms.”

Samantha, interviewing, calls Marjorie a baby and says she needs to come out of her shell.  “Welcome to America.”  Samantha’s getting a lot of airtime tonight also, and now I’m afraid for her as well.  Don’t send my favorites home yet, Tyra!

The winner of this challenge will get 50 extra frames at the photo shoot.  First, though, Paulina’s going to tell us who really botched it, and that was Samantha, for much the same reason she pissed off Jeremy Scott.  Don’t mess with the design of the clothes!  The winner is McKey.

Back at the house, we’re out of transgenders, Alaskans, and racists, so it falls to Marjorie’s French-ness to provide some drama.  The girls gather in the living room as Marjorie again explains her breakdown.  The girls take turns urging Negative Nancy to stay positive, but Marjorie falls back on Paulina’s explanation.  I don’t disagree with the notion that you can have negativity programmed into your brain by your parents.  But at some point, especially if you recognize that in yourself, you have to make changes.  Marjorie’s using her acceptance of the negativity as an excuse to continue being negative.  See?  I warned you all from the start there was something wrong with her.  Samantha seems the most put out by Marjorie’s impassioned, “I am what I am” bit, and they argue back and forth heatedly over what’s viewed as a lack of self-confidence on Marjorie’s part.  Clark interviews that if she can’t pull it together and believe in herself, Marjorie’s going to fall soon.  Well, my fingers are crossed.  Samantha and Marjorie agree to disagree, or they would, if one of them were smart enough to suggest it.

Joslyn interviews, “Poor Marjorie.  She has had a pretty tough week.  But with Marjorie’s nerves, she’s probably had several tough weeks.”  And that sums Marjorie up in a nutshell.  Emphasis on the NUT.

The next day, the girls arrive for a shoot against the backdrop of a mini-set of L.A.  Mr. Jay explains the shoot dressed as the Swamp Thing, because … I don’t know why.  The girls will be larger than life destructive forces of nature that take over the city.  So it’s like if Godzilla were doing a photo spread, in terms of the scale.  The girls get ’60s mod hair and makeup for the shoot.

Elina likes earthquakes, because they’re passionate and angry.  Except she doesn’t quite bring that.  Sheena (Sandstorm) brought variety and bland.  Jay feels he has to pull a good shot out of Clark (Blackout), which goes against the cocky attitude she’s brought into this shoot.  Lauren Brie (Snowstorm) and Joslyn (Rockslide) disappoint, Jay is afraid that Joslyn’s not rebounding from her bad shoot last week.  Analeigh (Santa Ana Winds), rocks it.  McKey (Heat Wave) is “amazing.”  Jay loves Samantha’s (Tidal Wave) creativity and energy.  With Marjorie (Traffic Jam), Jay feels like a puppeteer, “spoon-feeding” her movements.  Marjorie takes the criticism personally, and feels “deflated.”  Samantha does the right thing and tries to comfort her, but Marjorie does not believe in being comforted.  “It’s too bad.  I failed.”

Clark says she’s numero uno in the competition right now.  In case she forgets, she just checks out her digital photograph.  Repeatedly.  Samantha’s feeling sure of herself because she rocked her photo.  Joslyn’s nervous.

Judging.  Guest judge is this week’s photographer, Brian Edwards.  Paulina says Marjorie’s photo is “great and fun.”  No mention of her being spoon-fed.  Lauren Brie’s shot came together when she loosened up.  Miss J calls Samantha “exquirsite [sic],” Nigel loves the photo.  Tyra says Clark missed the point, and “got stuck on pretty.”  Elina’s all “ugly pretty,” which is good.  Nigel loves Sheena’s photo, and I think he’s crushing a little bit.  Analeigh did well but could bring more.  Miss J says Joslyn’s been slipping, and Brian thought the shoot was a struggle.  Tyra likes McKey’s shot, Nigel doesn’t.

Deliberation.  Favorites: Samantha, Sheena, Analeigh.  Less so: Marjorie, Lauren Brie, Joslyn, and Clark.  Called first: Samantha.  Eat that, Clark!  Bottom two: Not Marjorie.  Sooooooo disappointing.  Instead, Joslyn and Clark.  Joslyn started strong, but is she losing her fire?  Clark grew stronger, but is never fantastic.  And Joslyn’s personality gets her by this week.  She cries her thank you’s.  Tyra tells Clark to break out of the pretty thing and commit.  Clark interviews in a tiara that this was the best experience of her life.  Try to remember how young all these girls are.

Next week: We’re out of bitches, so who’s going to bring the drama?

Season 11, Episode 6: Natural Beauty (originally aired October 1, 2008)

Wednesdays at 8/7C, The CW

Photographs courtesy of The CW at http://www.cwtv.com/shows/americas-next-top-model11