The Office: A Very Melancholy Christmas

As soon as I learned that Thursday’s holiday episode of The Office was titled “Moroccan Christmas” I was stoked.  Certainly it would be filled with holiday folly, inappropriate and slightly racist comments from Michael, and maybe Jim performing a belly dance (fingers crossed).  Instead, The Office presented a very melancholy Christmas, entirely lacking in cheer and abundant in sadly serious scenarios.  What gives?

The episode started strong with a Jim prank on Dwight – the one gift that keeps on giving.  Jim wrapped Dwight’s desk, chair, and miscellaneous items in wrapping paper, or at least it seemed he did until Dwight put his suitcase down on the desk and tried to sit on his chair and both proceeded to collapse.  Cue Jim “whoops” face.  Classic.

Then it was time for the Moroccan Christmas party thrown by Phyllis who’s still blackmailing Angela over her affair with Dwight.  Phyllis proceeds to boss Angela around, much to Angela’s annoyance (but what isn’t?).  Michael starts pouring drinks he made up – including an “orangevodkarie” (read: screwdriver) which Jim is stunned no one’s thought of before.  Andy starts strumming away on a sitar (I think?) and singing songs about nudity and French women dancing, you may know it.  And Dwight starts pawning dolls with unicorn horns – this year’s Tickle-me-Elmo? – for twice their price to procrastinating, desperate parents.

However, the reverie soon turns solemn when Meredith lights her hair on fire during a drunken belly dance.  Dwight puts her out with the extinguisher, but everyone is alarmed.  So Michael stops the party to call an intervention.  Unfortunately, Meredith is adamant that she’s not an alcoholic, while everyone else is either uncomfortable or apathetic toward Meredith’s obvious drinking problem.  The only one up in arms is Michael – whose concern in this case isn’t actually misplaced, and it’s hard to figure out why his failure to reach Meredith is funny.

The discomfort continues when Michael, after a long discussion with Meredith in his office, tricks her into driving to a rehab center under the pretext that he’s taking her out for a drink. (How gullible are you, Meredith?) But when they get to the center Meredith screams like she’s being attacked, gets chased around the parking lot, and then literally dragged into the center by Michael.  Is alcoholic denial funny now?  Sure, I’ve laughed at Meredith’s boozy ways in the past, but confronting it head-on for an entire episode just makes it clear how unfunny her problem is.

Similar discomfort occurs when Toby tries to buy one of the horn-headed dolls from Dwight for his daughter.  Sad sack Toby needs this gift to impress his kid, but Dwight just sold his last doll to Darryl.  Luckily Darryl agrees to sell it to Toby, at a considerable mark-up, moving Toby nearly to tears.  But then Toby looks at the doll and realizes it’s a black doll.  Yes, it’s funny when Toby tries to cover his disappointment by telling Darryl it’s better than the one he wanted, but wait a beat and you realize Toby’s little blond daughter is not going to think so.  She’s going to want the blond doll that looks like her, and Toby’s going to be a failure.  At least in Christmas episodes past, Toby’s gotten his way in the end – remember when Pam gave him her robe after Michael took his?  It was a sugary sweet Christmas moment.  Yet this year, Toby was left with nothing.

But the biggest downer of the episode had to be the outing of Angela.  After following Phyllis’ directions for the whole party, Angela finally cracks and tells Phyllis she won’t do it anymore because she knows Phyllis will never reveal her secret.  Just as it looks like Angela’s bested Phyllis again, Phyllis reveals to the whole office that Angela’s been sleeping with Dwight.  Uncomfortable!  Dwight looks smug and proud of himself, and Angela looks near tears.  Everyone else looks at a loss.

Then, to make matters worse, Andy comes in – after missing Phyllis’ announcement – and begins to serenade his bride with a Christmas ditty.  Angela’s forcing back the waterworks now, and even Phyllis starts to look guilty and ashamed as clueless Andy plays on.  Tell me Office writers, where was the holly and jolly in this?  Because you know what’s funny at the holidays?  Adultery!

This Christmas on The Office no one got what they wanted, including me.  Let’s hope there’s something better in store for the new year.

Season 5, Episode 10: Moroccan Christmas (originally aired December 11, 2008)

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