30 Rock: Space Press Conference Banner

It’s Jack’s 50th birthday this week, and he’s planning a party. This immediately sent my mind off on a whole “We could certainly party with the Haitians!” riff. But Jack isn’t planning a little garden party, oh no. He’s feeling good – after all, the list he made in 5^th grade of all the things he wanted to do before he was 50 is nearly complete, save for “Be friends with Batman” – and he’s planning a high-end shindig at his place. Fun for everyone!

Meanwhile, Liz gets an unwelcome visit from one Dennis Duffy. I was unthrilled about this as well – I didn’t start watching the show until after Dennis was already gone, and I’ve never enjoyed his return appearances – but this time, he unveils a shocker. It turns out Dennis and Jenna hooked up once upon a time (it’s not their fault, they were feeling very emotional about Hurricane Katrina). But Liz is determined not to let it ruin her friendship with Jenna. Well, she’s determined after she almost kills Jenna via improperly hooked up set equipment, anyway.

Plus, Tracy has decided to fulfill his childhood dream of going into space. He even holds a press conference to announce his plans, complete with microphones from NBC, NBC and MSNBC. Jack won’t let Tracy go to space, but he won’t dash his childhood dream, either, so Liz and Pete and the rest of the crew simulate space travel for Tracy. Wouldn’t it have been easier just to take him to Epcot? 

But the real heart-tugging moments of the episode come, as usual, from Jack. Despite his immense wealth and his Peggy-Fleming-kissing track record, he realizes he’ll never be as happy again as he was when he was 10. But it’s all okay, because Liz was in a sex line commercial once and it was really funny.

And, among the many thought-provoking questions raised by this week’s episode, I’ll leave you with my favorite: Has Tina Fey always had such an awesome Muppet walk, or was that improv?

Other things we learned this week:

• Jenna lost her virginity to the My Fair Lady soundtrack.
• Liz tried to be an actress once. Despite her neck.
• Kenneth sees the world as a 24-hour Muppet show. Jack sees dollar signs on everything. But only Tracy Malkovich Malkovichs.

Lines I resolve to use ASAP:

• What is this, Horseville? Cause I am surrounded by naysayers! Wordplay!
• Shut your white mouth and get that cable, get it!
• I once shot a manatee.
• I don’t have friends at NASA. Bunch of nerds.
• Good luck with your fake addiction and your inconveniently located vending machines.
• The closest I came to vomiting tonight was when I saw Ann Coulter’s shoulder blades.
• You’re no longer my plus one to the Canadian Grammys.
• See you tomorrow, Bijou.

Season 3, Episode 16: Apollo, Apollo (originally aired March 27, 2009)

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Photographs courtesy of NBC Universal and Jessica Miglio