Entourage: Let’s All Take Some “E”

OK I admit it – maybe my expectations were a little too high for the new season of Entourage. But how could they not be? I mean, season 5 ended with the cast sprinting in hot pursuit of the crazy German, Vince’s movie being shelved indefinitely, the bromance between E and Vince ending when Vince gave him the axe as his manager, a Scorsese film offer and the stunner of all stunners – Ari Gold setting foot in Queens. So yeah, I guess you could say the bar was set a wee bit high for the new crop of episodes. I hoped for greatness, but what I got was an overdose of E and not enough Drama (both kinds) – not exactly the half hour I expected. But, as basketball teams sometimes have rebuilding years, I guess this was what you’d call a ‘rebuilding episode’, necessary for development if not all that riveting.

Vince, fresh off his exile as the pariah of Hollywood, is back at the bachelor pad and gearing up to take on the really tough tasks in life (no, not fixing the stimulus package or curing cancer), passing his driving test. His boy Turtle needn’t worry about being out of his chauffeuring gig any time soon though, since Vince’s road test looked like Alicia Silverstone’s in Clueless. Lucky for him his DMV instructor was willing to overlook a dozen or so crushed traffic cones (cones, pedestrians, same difference…) and look the other way in exchange for some tickets to his movie premiere. Vince returns the favor later that night by ratting him out while on Leno (a curious thing to include – unless the guy gets fired as a result and shows up on the red carpet with an Uzi and a bone to pick, it probably could’ve been left out frankly). It doesn’t seem to bother his publicist Shauna though, (yes folks they even brushed the cobwebs off Debi Mazar and rolled her ol’ bones out for the new season) and by the end of his appearance Team Chase are all convinced that Vince is about to reclaim his Hollywood crown.

Meanwhile, E is scoring tons of girls and Turtle is still dating Jamie Lynn Sigler, proving that the end of the world is indeed near. Kidding. Actually I’m happy that Turtle is still getting some action, it always gives the regular guys hope when someone who resembles Joey Fatone can still pull chicks. He seems to be splitting his time between smoking weed, taking baths with Meadow Soprano and busting E’s chops with Drama, so I’d say his life is looking up these days. Likewise, E can be found nailing half of LA until his old flame Sloan calls him up and suddenly he’s like one of Pavlov’s dogs, drooling at the very sound of her voice. To be fair, Emmanuelle Chriqui looked so ridiculously good, even I wanted to date her and I don’t even play for that team. I think I speak for all viewers when I say how confounded I am by the fact that E looks like a lawn jockey and yet she’s still into it. Sloan convinces him to come view and ultimately rent her friend’s house, and we’re all left wondering if she wants him to move out of the clubhouse because she wants to date him again or she just thinks he’s grown unnaturally fond of Drama’s egg frittatas.

And speaking of growing unnaturally fond of something, Lloyd is convinced that Ari is too comfortable with him as assistant and that he’ll never get the promotion he deserves so he puts his loafer-clad foot down and gives Ari an ultimatum –  make him an agent or he walks. Oh, and then Lloyd plays the family card and calls Mrs. Ari to get her on his side. Well played, Lloyd, well played. Ari responds by telling Lloyd to come to his house at night and then makes him sit on his doorstep for hours to see how badly he really wants the job. Yeah, that’s a pretty A-hole thing to do, but I hardly noticed, I was too busy contemplating how much Lloyd must get paid to have that sweet a ride and be able to afford Fonzworth Bentley’s wardrobe (the sweater vest, I mean how can you not love Lloyd?). Then Ari tells Lloyd he’s giving him a 100 day hazing period and if he can still hang after that, the promotion is his (cue the next 5 episodes of Asian jokes and gay slurs – make that 15 actually). I for one am ecstatic that Lloyd got some extra screen time, his episodes never disappoint.

The episode ends with the crew buzzing about the upcoming Gatsby premiere (which should’ve been the focus of THIS episode if you ask me) and Vince sitting on the couch in an empty house, as all of his boys are off living their lives. Awwww, I think we were supposed to feel badly for him but I didn’t. I mean, he gets more tail than a public restroom toilet seat (for lack of a classier way of putting it – witness the car scene), so I’m sure he’ll bounce. On an excitement scale I’d give this episode a 4. On a Lloyd scale though, I’d give it a 9.5. It had something for everyone, gratuitous Sloan shots, male-friendly sex scene…They even had an Easy E song. See, it’s fun for the whole family! I’m curious to see how they’re going to make the Gatsby spectacle trump Aquaman next week. In the meantime, I’ll be making Lloyd my screensaver if you need me.

Season 6, Episode 1: Drive (originaly aired  July 12th 2009)

For another take on this episode, read Tanya Lane’s review here.

For more Entourage, click here.

Sundays at 10pm ET/PT on HBO

Photographs courtesy of HBO.