Project Runway: You Snooze You Lose

This week the designers are glad to be done with a group challenge and Qristyl thinks she’ll just be known as the Notorious B-I-T-C-H (and to be clear, I don’t think she was noticeably bitchy last week).  Anyway, Heidi says there are 13 women waiting for the designers and they need to make the women feel good.  And who are the women?  Their usual models.  But Tim explains these Models of the Runway need fabulous outfits for career networking opportunities.  And here, I thought this was going to be a prom challenge.  Blurgh!  Anyway, the models caucus with the designers and it’s all a blur and you don’t care about the details.  So up up and away to Mood!

Tim’s Take.  First we see Althea’s simple black skirt with cigarette jacket (a/k/a a smoking jacket), which Tim likes but thinks she should lose the cummerbund look.  Then we see Christopher with “a bold color” green, and Tim just laughs at the suggestion that she’ll look like a salad.  Epperson talks about flowing punk and Tim’s talking about punky tigers, I think he likes it.  Qristyl’s design gives Tim concern over her messiness, in that it looks like she’s been rolling around in bed.

After Tim leaves, we see Epperson crying and talking with his family on the phone.  Based on past seasons, this usually means he’s going home.  On the other hand, we’ve really been focusing on him so maybe it means he wins.  This is me being decisive, people, okay?  Send in the models for their fitting because I need a break from the tedium of this episode.

Runway.  Heidi intros our judges for the week: Marc Bouwer, Zoe Glassner (filling in for Nina Garcia), and Jennifer Rade.  I like Shirin’s and that’s about it–I was concerned that so many of the designers couldn’t fit the bosom region of the models this week.  Heidi asks some designers to stay.  They like Carol Hannah’s but think Logan’s design is a little too prom-like.  I’ll note for the record that Logan is wearing a Seven Dwarfs hat and I’m not sure what that’s about.  Epperson goes over well but Heidi is concerned about whether his model’s bosom is perky and in the right spot (see, I told you so).  With Johnny, nothing is interesting except for the Macy’s Accessory Wall purse, and Heidi gives it the kiss of death by saying it belongs on a bridesmaid.  They rip Qristyl to shreds, noting that her model may like the dress but thankfully she’s not a designer because the outfit stunk.  And they all love Althea’s design but ignore that the design is more for a prostitute than a model, what with the mini-mini skirt and the breasts flailing about on the top.

Results.  Epperson is in (glad to know the editing isn’t as predictable this season), and Althea wins (WTF?!?).  It all comes down to Qristyl and Logan, and Logan is in and Qristyl is out.  And not a moment too soon for me as I was having trouble remembering how to spell her name week after week.  Overall, this was one of the dullest episodes in the six seasons of the show.  With twelve more designers to go, I hope this isn’t indicative of the rest of the season.

Next week: Tacky insects or words to that effect.

For another take on this episode, check out The One About the Models by Jaimie Campos.

Listen to The J Factor with J.B. and Jaimie here or on iTunes.

Season 6, Episode 4: What a Woman Wants (originally aired September 10, 2009)

For more on Project Runway, click here.

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Photographs courtesy of Lifetime