The Real Housewives of Atlanta: Twice the Crazy

Personally, I don’t think Atlanta can handle two NeNes – or two Shereès, for that matter. But, that didn’t stop the ladies from getting in touch with their inner bad girl alter-egos and doubling the insane factor on this week’s episode. We have NeNe to thank for the ego-centric antics, as she organized a photo shoot with Derek Blanks, one of Atlanta’s hottest celebrity photographers, which I think was just her way of telling the other ladies exactly what she thinks of them in a passive aggressive way (brilliant). The producers actually packed a lot into this hour.  Here’s what our southern belles were up to:

Lisa is no crack whore, just in case you were wondering. She makes a point of taking Kim to lunch to reinforce this idea, and remarkably no one pulls off any wigs or throws any punches. Plus, Kim blames her wagging mouth on a Google alert and doesn’t admit to being a gossip, so all in all it was a fairly boring truce – but necessary so that they didn’t kill each other at the shoot. Elsewhere having lunch across town were Kandi and Shereè, who learned of Kandi’s recent family tragedy, and dare I say it Shereè actually feigns being an actual human being for a minute.  Sadly, Kandi’s cousins and AJ’s nephew were hit by a drunk driver and his nephew sustained the most serious injuries, landing him in the I.C.U. This scene was actually very touching and difficult to watch, as it reminds us that the housewives are actually carrying around problems larger than what type of manicure to get at the salon. Even Shereè was moved to tears – yes, actual tears, I didn’t know robots could cry? Poor Kandi, I don’t know what she should be more upset about, the accident or the fact that she’s gotten suckered into recording the world’s most disastrous country/hip hop mash up song “Tardy to the Party.”

And speaking of disasters… Kim was in hiring mode after being left nannyless after Tampon-gate ’09. I don’t know what I was more put off by during Kim’s interviewing process, the fact that she told a girl she didn’t need to see her résumé because she complimented Kim’s hooker boots or the fact that the nanny search was conducted by Kim’s assistant Myliek. Wait, why does Kim even have an assistant? Oh, actually a girl can only juggle so much and with a glass of wine in one hand and a Virginia Slims 100 in the other that doesn’t leave any free hands to do anything else – never mind, makes sense.

Now for the real action: the alter-ego photo shoot. I find it strange that NeNe puts so much emphasis on insisting that her friends are ghetto and yet shuns the label herself – considering that she made her own alter-ego be a bustier-wearing stripper. I couldn’t help but be fearful that at any point one of NeNe’s gigantic breasts (I’m sorry Dwight, “melons”) was going to fly out of her costume and knock out an innocent photo assistant, but luckily no unsuspecting bystanders were hurt. I’ll say this for her, though – the girl can work the pole. She actually did a good job directing the ladies in their shoots, to her credit, even convincing Kim to really explore her acting range by playing a mistress – a stretch for her, I know. It was a nice rebound after having to rethink Kim’s shoot last minute since she refused to be painted into a different race (best line of the show, NeNe to Kim: “girl, you better get black and get black fast”). Kandi’s drunken driver/innocent victim shoot was a bit random and unsettling but I guess that was the point and it was definitely more profound than Lisa’s girlscout-being-pushed-off-her-bike scene.

The best job of the day, though, had to go to Kandi for being the lucky b*tch who got to do what every event planner, nay, every person in Atlanta would die to do – choke Shereè around the neck. Props to Shereè though for having a sense of humor about being a gold digger. If only Dwight had been allowed to dress up as his inner female alter-ego the shoot would’ve been perfect, alas…Next week Kim’s relationship with Big Poppa is the butt of the joke, and NeNe is being a big bully – but what else is new?

Season 2, Episode 6: My Ego is Bigger Than Your Ego (originally aired September 3, 2009)

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Thursdays at 10pm on Bravo

Photographs courtesy of NBC Universal and Wilford Harewood