Real Housewives of Atlanta: Season Finale Throw Down

I think it’s safe to say that the cat fight between NeNe and Kim was epic – insults were hurled, fingers were wagged (and shoved away) and NeNe even (allegedly) grabbed Kim’s throat and tried to choke her. It was the Battle Royale of the Real Housewives series.

…Only they didn’t get it on film.

I think I speak for everyone when I say – how the hell did the producers manage to miss the brawl to end all brawls? Someone at Bravo is kicking themselves over this – and probably packing up their desk too. Their brilliant solution to missing NeNe and Kim’s Ultimate Fighting Championship imitation was two-fold – hey, you can’t blame them for trying.

First, they had both Kim and NeNe give a blow-by-blow recap of the melee, Kim sharing her account with Kandi and NeNe’s version being retold to a stunned Dwight in his living room. Then, they staged a mafia-style sit down with the women, posing it as Kim “wanting to speak with NeNe about what happened” prior to them having to run into one another at Sheree’s fashion show. Kim claims it was done to make sure that they were able to be in the same room together without another blow up, but we all know that the producers were hoping that the women would come out swinging again (this time with the cameras rolling). Nobody threw any punches or pulled any wigs this time around, but they did capture the ladies yelling at each other once they realized that their recollections weren’t exactly in agreement. NeNe swears that Kim “put her hands on her” (Kim says she just swatted NeNe’s finger from her face), while Kim says NeNe is lucky she didn’t press charges after NeNe grabbed her neck and choked her. Either way, no olive branches were exchanged and they both went into Sheree’s fashion show vowing to ignore each other – and the palpable tension – just to get through the night.

Speaking of Sheree’s show, she really outdid herself with the preparations for her big She by Sheree unveiling – and by “she outdid herself,” I mean Dwight did. Yes, the unofficial sixth housewife Dwight logged many hours prepping and finalizing all the details to make sure that Sheree’s show went off without a hitch, unlike last season’s fiasco. Sheree, for her part, took nearly all of the credit and repeated how proud she was of herself for pulling it off about a thousand times. Humility isn’t exactly her strong point. The rest of the housewives seemed impressed too (except Lisa), and now we can finally stop hearing about her damn clothing line, enough already.

Kandi and AJ received a pleasant mother’s day surprise when Kandi’s mom unexpectedly pulled AJ aside and told him that she will support their relationship so long as AJ makes her daughter happy. This was a very sweet moment, even if Kandi’s mom seemed like she was straining to get the words out. It just makes the realization that Kandi and AJ will never get their shot at happiness all the more heartbreaking, and as the disclaimer on each episode keeps repeating now, our thoughts are with AJ’s loved ones as well.

Earlier in the episode, Kandi had a not-so-pleasant encounter with NeNe, who demanded an apology from her for their previous fight. Kandi wasn’t having any of it, and NeNe learned that she may be able to bully the other ladies, but she’s going to have a harder time throwing her weight around (which is apparently moose-like, according to Kim) with Kandi.  NeNe also locked horns in a rare argument with her husband Gregg this week, a result of her meeting with her alleged birth father Alan while visiting her hometown. Gregg warned NeNe not to bother with Alan, who he sees as being opportunistic, and NeNe followed up despite his reservations. Since Gregg is almost the only person on the show who NeNe doesn’t seem to fight with, it was strange to see them argue, and it drove the usually stoic NeNe to tears. So, the final tally of people NeNe pissed off this episode was 3 – Kim, Kandi and Gregg; not bad for 45 minutes of programming. Let’s see if next season she can beat her record, lord knows she’ll try.

Lisa and Ed may be planning to expand their family, but the poor economy and Ed’s now non-existent NFL paycheck have caused them to decrease the size of their living quarters. Yes, the Wu Hartwells have decided to downsize from their mansion to a smaller home that Ed owned before he married Lisa. She seems to be trying to hide her disappointment, but honestly the house is still pretty swanky and she’ll have plenty of projects to work on, like the pool, guest house and renovations they’re already planning. Yeah, I know, I don’t really feel badly for them either. Apparently they still haven’t been able to get pregnant again, but here’s hoping for a new cast member next season!

That’s about it for season 2, but in the grand tradition of Real Housewives there is going to be one heck of a reunion planned for next week. I will, of course, be weighing in on all the action, which you can preview some clips of right now on the show’s site if you just can’t wait until next Thursday. Can Kim and NeNe be in the same room without killing each other? How is Kandi holding up after AJ’s death? Is Sheree a lesbian? (What?! I know, she responds to the rumors on the reunion show apparently). And does anybody even care about the song “Tardy for the Party” anymore? Find out next week and check back right here on Poptimal.com.

Season 2, Episode 13: Catwalks and Cat Fights (originally aired October 22, 2009).

For more on the Real Housewives of Atlanta, click here.

Thursdays at 10pm on Bravo

Photographs courtesy of NBC Universal, John Amis and Quantrell Colbert