Dancing With the Stars: Round 9

It’s the semi-finals and it’s time to narrow it down to the finalists.  Each couple will perform an exhausting three dances.

ROUND 1

Donny & Kym:  They are performing the Argentine Tango to a song I absolutely love: Sam Sparro’s “Black & Gold.”  It is adequate but doesn’t really resonate with me.  After the dance Donny immediately starts moaning and pouting.  Apparently Kym’s dress got caught in her heel and they completely lost it.  Carrie Ann said the dance had no drama.  Donny makes a lame joke about being thrown off by Marie’s presence.  The judges give them 7s across the board.

Joanna & Derek:  The pair will be dancing the Viennese Waltz.  Last week they wowed the judges with their futuristic Paso Doble and look to carry that momentum forward.  It is slow, serene, and rather boring.  She’s one of the loveliest dancers on the show this season and I think she should be in the finals.  Bruno said their Waltz had the grace of angels from heaven.  Carrie Ann said she took her breath away.  Len said her hold is as good as any professional’s and that she looked fantastic.  The judges had some minor criticism, but overall they seemed to enjoy it.  9s across the board.

Kelly & Louis:  Now it’s time for my least favorite contestant.  I have nothing against Kelly; I just don’t think she’s as good as the others at this point.  During rehearsal she got a phone call saying that one of her dogs died.  She was understandably distraught, but she stuck it out and finished practicing.  She and Louis perform the Rumba.  It’s a very good dance, but I just don’t think she measures up in comparison to the other stars.  There are only a handful of celebs left, so they are each subject to a lot of scrutiny.  The crowd seemed to love it.  Carrie Ann was brought to tears, saying that Kelly reached right into her heart and made her love her.  Len said any dance she gets, she dances well – but he doesn’t think this was her best dance.  Bruno said that the Rumba requires a relentless sense of eroticism, and it was missing from their dance.  8s across the board.

Mya & Dmitry:  The high-powered couple received a perfect score last week and will have to work even harder to duplicate that this week.  Mya is dedicated, even sleeping in the studio so she can put in as much time as possible.  Their Waltz is graceful and magical.  They also incorporate a high level of difficulty in their routines.  Mya is nearly as good as the professional dancers.  Len said she was in control for the entire dance and was a joy to watch.  Bruno said it was love set to music and he loved it.  Carrie Ann loved it too but felt she was slightly not connected in her hold.  Carrie Ann: 9 Len: 9 Bruno: 10

ROUND 2

Donny & Kym:  They give some background on Donny’s childhood and long professional career.  They talk to a few of his sons who seem to really admire him.  He and Kym dance the Samba, which partially redeems him for his earlier Tango.  I didn’t think it was that great, but Donny got through it.  Each celebrity will have to dance a solo segment within each round two dance, and Donny’s was nothing special.  Bruno said it was effortless and carefree.  Carrie Ann said it seemed sloppy.  Len agrees with Bruno that it was strong and determined.  Carrie Ann: 8 Len: 9 Bruno: 9

Joanna & Derek:  Joanna emigrated from Poland at age 5.  Her mother worked grueling hours to provide for her family.  She took ballet lessons until age 9 but had to quit because her mother couldn’t afford it.  Her younger sister looks just like her.  Joanna seems to have been focused at a young age and never let adversity to discourage her.  Wait a minute is Joanna a Playboy model? I thought she was a swimsuit model.  Why is Hugh Hefner sharing his opinion?  Anyway, their Cha Cha Cha is cute, but rather sedate.  Carrie Ann said she truly is a dancer and she did a great job.  Len said it had good rhythm and it was clean but could have been more cheeky.  Bruno said that she oozes sex and that she has achieved a high standard and should be proud of herself.  9s across the board.

Kelly & Louis:  They’ve got the Quickstep for the second round.  It’s a fun performance and I can see her improvement.  I don’t notice any mistakes in their dance, but I thought her footwork could have been a little smoother at times.  There was also a stumble at the very end.  Len said it was totally beyond his expectations and he was blown away.  Bruno said overall it was good.  Carrie Ann was excited, saying she nailed it. Kelly sucks up by thanking the judges for their comments throughout the season.  9s across the board.

Mya & Dmitry:  Mya’s segment about her childhood reveals early tap dance.  Her mother said that she always had musicality.  Their Salsa is amazing and the choreography is great.  Her solo is great also.  Bruno said it was sensational.  Carrie Ann said it was hot beyond belief and her solo was slammin.’  Len said “Tooty fruity what a booty.” He was mesmerized and said she deserved to be in the finals.  10s across the board.

ROUND 3

These dances are what the celebrities would have performed if they had competed in the head-to-head portion of the elimination episode, the so-called “knockout dance.”

Donny & Kym:  They perform a spirited Jitterbug that allows Donny to really maximize his cheesy personality and play to the crowd.  Carrie Ann said he needed this dance to be good and it was.  Len said it was a winner.  Bruno also enjoyed it.  9s across the board.

Joanna & Derek:  They dance the Salsa, which was very good.  All the judges thought she did a great job.  Len said it was hot, tasty and full of spice.  Bruno said it was delicious and flirtations. Carrie Ann said she’d like to see her in the finals.  9s across the board.

Kelly & Louis:  They have the Cha Cha Cha.  I think she’s good, but she just hasn’t risen to that next level.  Bruno said her precision and timing were good and he liked it.  Carrie Ann thought she finished her lines well.  Len said all three of her dances were at a high level.  9s across the board.

Mya & Dmirty:  I bet these two will get higher than a 9.  They also chose the Cha Cha Cha for their knockout dance.  It was crisp, clean and exciting.  I know Bruno’s going to like it.  Carrie Ann said she has great hip action and she threw in some tricks, but the beginning of the dance didn’t “speak” to her.  Len said he was disappointed…that it couldn’t go on longer.  Bruno said it was like an action-packed trailer for a blockbuster. ?????  Carrie Ann: 9 Len: 10 Bruno: 10

ELIMINATION

The judges choose Mya and Dmitry’s Salsa for an encore.  After recapping the contestant’s scores we watch the final four squirm under the hot red elimination lights.  After what feels like an eternity we find out that Mya is safe.  Kelly, Joanna and Donny will have to sweat bullets a little longer, sitting through more guest performances and dances.  Eventually only Kelly and Joanna remain in the bottom two, and Joanna is eliminated.  I’ve made my feelings about Kelly known. Hopefully Donny and Mya end up going head to head in the finals next week, and I can’t wait to see everyone’s freestyle.

Season 9, Week 9: Episodes 18&19 (originally aired November 16&17, 2009)

For more on Dancing with the Stars, click here.

Competition Mondays at 8/7C, ABC

Elimination Tuesdays at 9/8C, ABC

Photographs courtesy of ABC, Adam Larkey