Gossip Girl: Fall Finale of Epic Proportions

This week’s episode of Gossip Girl marked a significant point in this third season of the series. Not only did it advance one major storyline, but it seemed to be starting other ones that will likely carry through until the end of the season. You might ask, what’s the catch? Well, the show will not be back on until March 8 so The CW can make room for another show in hopes of boosting their ratings. This gives us plenty of time to reflect on what’s come so far, and what we think will be waiting for us in the spring.

Episode 12: “The Debarted” was very generous in screentime to Squints, but first let’s discuss the big cliffhanger from last week when Serena left with Trip instead of Nate. After their Thanksgiving escape, Trip apparently whisked Serena away to a big old house in the middle of nowhere and began acting and dressing like a major douche bag. He is secretly meeting with his wife while Serena lies around in sweat pants calling Nate out of boredom (she doesn’t deserve him) so he can unveil the secret pot stash of the family home. We never get to see her light up though because Trip’s wife Maureen shows up to offer Serena the chance to continue sleeping with Trip as long as Maureen can remain his public, trophy wife. Her leverage for this deal is the letter from Serena’s biological father, which ended up in her coat pocket by mistake on Thanksgiving. The letter reveals that Serena’s mom, Lily, has been “hanging out” with him behind the back of her new husband, Rufus. It’s all very convoluted but in a nutshell Serena gets offended (obviously), demands that Trip drive her home, and then they get in a bad car wreck on the way.

I can’t believe I’m about to say this but THIS is actually where things start to get crazy. Serena is knocked out from the crash and Trip’s first call isn’t to 9-1-1 but to Maureen. He then leaves the scene of the accident a la Ted Kennedy at Chappaquiddick and claims to have never been in the car at all. All of the characters eventually show up at the hospital to comfort Serena and Trip feigns shock and sadness but Nate knows better and punches him in the face. It’s funny how drastically the writers managed to change perceptions of Trip and make me want to see him get punched. When I first started watching he seemed sweet, kind, and a little bit irresistible thanks to that baby face but in the last few episodes he really morphed into a weak and terrible person, which I found really disappointing. Naturally, he’s the one character headed to work in Washington, D.C.

One would think that the above content would be more than enough for one episode of television, but sure enough there were about sixteen other storylines going on. Dan decided to fool around for a second with some new girl but realized that he loved Vanessa so he tells her that and she brushes it off. Eric and Jenny do stupid things involving exclusive handbags but then decide to call a truce in their feud although Jenny is still hanging out with the drug-dealing foreigner with no hint of an accent. And for the first time since I’ve been watching, Squints got real scenes to play out as he looks into purchasing a new property with the ghost of his dad haunting him along the way. He considers leaving Blair to focus on his career and is actually quite mean to her but this strangely makes her act and speak like a human (this is rare) to comfort him and the scene was almost touching. At the very end he goes to visit his father’s grave and finds a mysterious woman standing there. She yells, “Charles!” and then runs away like a crazy person. I assume this is his mother and that a good portion of the rest of the season will involve tracking her down and figuring out what her deal is. I honestly can’t claim to be intrigued.

Beyond that it looks like we’ll see a romance blossom between Nate and Serena, a marriage fall apart for Lily and Rufus, and Jenny is on track to becoming a regular drug runner. I don’t foresee an episode of her harvesting opium in Afghanistan but it should be fun either way. So until the spring, enjoy your Gossip Girl vacation!

For another take on this episode, check out For the Love of Chuck Bass by Trisha Huntsman.

Season 3, Episode 12: The Debarted (originally aired December 7, 2009)

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Photographs courtesy of The CW, Giovanni Rufino