Lost: Poker Face

Just who is manipulating whom here? (who? whom? it?)

So my biggest question this week is where did fake Locke (Flocke) come from and where is he trying to go? Let’s just jump right into the cave action because that was the biggest reveal of the week, attempting to answer why they are all on the island.

So, Flocke finds a trashed Sawyer in his Dharmaville house and gets him to follow him into the jungle. Drunk people will do anything. Sawyer didn’t seem that phased that Locke was dead, and noted that Flocke was different from John since he didn’t seem to have any fear. Again, maybe that’s a boozy observation but maybe Sawyer knows something is seriously amiss. They eventually (I’ll get to the weird barefoot boy in a minute) trek to a cliff with a ladder (Jacob’s Ladder? I’m not smart enough to really understand this reference) that descends into a cave (the Philosopher’s cave? I need a higher degree for this show). Now, is this cave really Flocke/smoke monster’s lair, or was it Jacob’s? Jacob seems pretty greedy with his real estate in cabins and in statues, so let’s assume it’s Flocke’s. If so, then why would all those names and numbers be Jacob’s scribbles, as Flocke claims? Also, I was a little unnerved by the whole white/black rock scale inside joke thing– if this all turns out to be a game like in the end of Men In Black, I’ll be pissed.

(Huge side note: for a hot second I was hoping/thinking that maybe JJ was pulling a huge throwback to the days of Felicity and all this crazy LOST nonsense was happening in Megan’s box! Any takers????).

Back on track: Flocke claims to be all about full disclosure, but I have a feeling he’s a big ol liar. He tells Sawyer that all those names and numbers represent candidates to take over Jacob’s role as protector of the island. He further claims that Jacob manipulated all of the “candidates” on his rock into coming to the island, nudging them and making them think that decisions were theirs when really he was controlling them. Theory: Oceanic 815 Universe represents a world where Jacob influences the Losties and Universe X is free of Jacob? Meh? I am so confused about Flocke and Jacob and which one represents destiny and who represents free will, because I guarantee this is a theme. Jacob seemed into telling the Losties that things were ultimately their own choice (telling Hurley he didn’t have to go back to the island in the cab, telling Ben that he didn’t have to kill him…), but then Flocke seems into letting the Losties live by free will too. Actually I take that back, Flocke is totally fatalistic based on that convo from the end of last season when he told Jacob that everything always ends the same way when Jacob brings people to the island. Sooooo why is Jacob bringing people to the island? What is the endgame? How did he and smokey get there in the first place? How did I get on this tangent?

This whole maneuver in the cave was for Flocke to convince Sawyer to leave the island with him (why does he need a chaperone?). He told Sawyer that the island doesn’t need protection and that it is just an island. Ok that HAS to be a lie. The island is clearly special with weird hippies all over the place, electromagnetism, time travel, smoke monsters, never aging people, etc. Also, remember way back in season 1 when Rousseau was leading the survivors to the Black Rock to get dynamite? The smoke monster had a cameo and she told the Losties that it was a security system protecting the island. Was she just misinformed? Is Flocke really protecting the island? Did he write all those names in the cave? Are the names on the rock the same as the the ones on Jacob’s lists? What’s with the numbers? Why wasn’t Kate’s name on the rock? Why is it a boy’s club? Woof. Sawyer says he wants to get off the island with Flocke, and I’m hoping that this is just another long con because I don’t want Sawyer to become infected or claimed or whatever. TBD.

Now let’s backtrack (as if this isn’t confusing enough) to that creepy boy in the woods. We first saw him when Flocke cut Richard down from the tree and told him it was time to talk. Out of the corner of his eye, Flocke sees this little blond barefoot boy with blood all over his outstretched hands. Cute. Richard seems to not see him, and Flocke looks freaked. Was this little Jacob? Zack of Zack and Emma from Oceanic 815? Later when Flocke brings Sawyer to the jungle, he sees him again and so does Sawyer. Flocke chases after him, and the boy (sans blood) tells smokey that he can’t kill him. Who is him? Is this a temple kid? Is he like Walt? Also, why did Flocke have a momentary lapse of cool with the whole “don’t tell me what I can’t do” rant?

Oh yeah, then there was that whole Universe X story line with John Locke. Oh Locke, I love you so. Locke X is in a wheelchair like pre-crash Oceanic 815 Locke, but his circumstances seem pretty different. He is still engaged to Helen, he has a good (or at least functional) relationship with his father (so how did he get in a wheelchair if he didn’t push him out a window? what does that mean for Sawyer if Cooper never conned his Mama?), and seems to have a more realistic attitude about his condition. He still has some moments like the old Locke, trying to get Rose (of course she runs the temp agency) to match him with a construction job to prove that he doesn’t have limitations with his handicap, but with some tough love from Bernard’s better half, he seems to be at peace with his situation.

This episode was titled “The Substitute,” which I guess is the antithesis of the Candidate. Locke’s body was the substitute for the smoke monster, which maybe he was destined to become since he played the role of a substitute in other ways– as the leader of the Others, as a teacher…that’s all I got so maybe not. So smokey needs substitutes and Jacob needs candidates. It all seems a little codependent for people (?) preaching about free will and choices.

I don’t even know where to leave off here because I felt like I was being lied to the whole episode… but I will say this, have we ended the days on LOST where Ben is the master manipulator? I never thought I’d see the day where Ben doesn’t have a plan but that might just be where we are. His eulogy for Locke was heartfelt and hilarious when he coolly admitted murdering John. But maybe he still has one trick up his sleeve since everyone thinks that Flocke killed Jacob, not Ben. Is this going to be important for anyone but Flocke?

Next week I hope we get into what the hell Claire has been doing for three years… hopefully picking up where Rousseau left off because she was tres entertaining, and I miss her dearly.

For another opinion on this episode, check out You Can’t Tell Me What To Do! by Bilal Mian.

Season 6 Episode 4: The Substitute (Originally Aired February 16, 2010)

For more on Lost, click here.

Wednesdays, 9/8c on ABC

Photographs courtesy of ABC and Mario Perez