Project Runway: Got You Covered

I was really tempted to name this review “Ten Things I Hate About Mila”, BUT decided she’s not worthy of that much attention. Although she may think she is. Honestly, is there anyone who isn’t annoyed by her yet? (Save for her mini-me Maya…)

So Tim Gunn tells us this week is “the biggest challenge in the history of Project Runway.” And I agree, it was a pretty awesome challenge. Designers had to create a look for a celebrity for the cover of the April issue of Marie Claire magazine. Now that’s already high stakes. But let’s make things even more nerve wracking – the outfit’s for Heidi Klum herself! Not gonna lie, that’s intimidating. She’s one of the judges, man…

Johanna Coles, Editor-in-Chief of Marie Claire and the guest judge of this challenge, gives the designers a few tips: the photo’s most likely going to be cropped so think about the top; no black; patterns are hard with with all the cover lines over it; it’s an April cover so think Spring, catchy, strong, cultured. Sheesh. If it were me, I’d be scared. I hate limits. So after shopping at Mood with a budget of $150, designers begin the process, with one day to complete their garment. The pressure is on! The workroom is unusually quiet as everyone’s in the zone. Even my nerves were going crazy, and I was just watching. My buddy Seth Aaron gave things a little kick with some bizarre singing and dancing, which put off the other designers. Oh let the man do his thing, you let Ping do hers!

Getting back to hating Mila, as Jay so politely put it, “there’s something kind of fake and not so sincere about Mila.” Emilio even mentioned she was “very cocky.” Thanks for the backup, guys. I mean, in the clip from last week she was whining that no one congratulated her for being in the top two. Let’s hear her sing about being in the bottom three this week. How’s that feel, Mila?! All right. I’m done now. I apologize. Let’s just…move onto judging.

As stated, Johanna Coles joins the panel of judges this week. (Taking one obligatory moment just to say how adorable Jesse looked in his pink shirt and suspenders. Goofball.) Of all the looks, the two that I liked most were Ben’s and Emilio’s. I did like Seth Aaron’s suit, and could totally see Heidi wearing it, but it was too dark for an April cover. Luckily he was safe. Another one that caught my eye was Jonathan’s. It was a beautiful top, but…what happened to the bottom? All I saw were legs. Bet it’s in his purse!

The top three were Ben, Anthony, and Emilio. Again, loved Ben’s “Madame Butterfly on acid” look. (Love the name too.) Nina and Michael agreed, saying it “cut through all the noise in a newstand crowd” and had a “beautiful front and back”. Heidi loved the back and Johanna said it was a “real conteder”. Anthony’s dress threw me a little but the judges loved it. Johanna and Nina loved the color, Michael loved the innovative shoulder strap, and Heidi liked how it was slimming. Emilio’s dress was adorable. But did we go back to the red challenge again? Oh my eyes… The judges loved the color but Michael had him cut off the straps and take the hair down – a Project Runway first. Either way, it looked great.

The bottom three were Anna Marie, Janeane, and Mila. (HA!) Anna’s look could have been found in Forever 21, in my opinion. Johanna’s comment was my favorite: “It looks like three ingredients in a dish that leave you feeling slightly nauseous”. Janeane’s look was semi-bridal and “not fashion forward”, said Heidi. Again, Johanna says it best: “I’m not getting the ocean…unless it’s a polluted sea with plastic bottles.” Ouch. Mila’s dress color pallette was all wrong. And I swear Nina said the same exact thing I thought at first, “it looks like arrows pointing at her crotch.”

The winner of the challenge was Anthony. Not my favorite but his excitement and attitude just make you feel so happy for him. Or was that just me? Eh. Anna Marie and her sorry excuse for a garment were out.

Next week we’re faced with miniatures! …I mean kids.  I’m already afraid.

Season 7, Episode 5: Run for Cover (originally aired February 11, 2010)

For more on Project Runway, click here.

Thursdays at 10pm EST on Lifetime

Photographs courtesy of Lifetime and IMDbPro