True Blood Review: Vamping It Up

Fret not, fellow television enthusiasts! Summer entertainment is officially here with a vengeance and available in the air-conditioned refuge of our own homes. Whew! HBO has come to the rescue of us indoor folk by finally unveiling the highly anticipated third season premiere of its cheeky, American Gothic vampfest True Blood. It’s time to mercifully bid adieu to the cavalcade of reality drivel polluting the airwaves since Memorial Day and bask in the glorious return of telepathic heroine Sookie Stackhouse (Anna Paquin) and her gang of vampires, shape-shifters and hilarious southern fried yokels as they roam the deep bayous of Bon Temps trying to reconcile the havoc wreaked last season by the antics of maniacal maenad Maryann (Michelle Forbes). In Season Two’s finale, the quirky, backwoods residents of the sleepy Louisiana town seemed to be working their way back to normality after Maryann’s triumphant defeat, but our plucky protagonist Sookie found herself in a last-minute pickle as her undead squeeze, Bill Compton (Stephen Moyer), was snatched by unseen kidnappers moments after he asked for her hand in marriage.

The writers wisely chose to begin Season Three precisely where the story had abruptly halted. Sookie is frantically trying to have a sheriff’s deputy take her request for a missing person’s report seriously (she knows Bill’s been taken, just not by whom or why), shape-shifting bar owner Sam Merlotte (Sam Trammell) is skipping town to track down his biological parents, Sookie’s brother, dreamy doofus Jason (Ryan Kwanten), is racked with guilt after an impulse reaction causes him to commit murder, newly “made” teen vamp Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) is faced with the predicament of overfeeding herself with the blood of a smarmy trucker, and we finally catch a glimpse of Bill in a backseat with his juiced-up posse of kidnappers.

While Sookie unsuccessfully tries to point out evidence of Bill’s abduction to the skeptical police officer (she thinks Sookie’s lack of response to Bill’s proposal caused him to bail on account of his surely bruised ego), the presentation of the other subplots weaved throughout the episode match her frenetic pace. One after another, each storyline is rightfully acknowledged, then promptly tossed aside to make room for the next. For starters? Bumbling, back-on-the-wagon detective Andy Bellefleur (Chris Bauer) takes the blame for Jason’s impromptu fatal shooting of Eggs, beau of Sookie’s best friend Tara (Rutina Wesley). Stricken with debilitating grief, Tara sinks into a wallowing pit of despair that renders her suicidal. The revelation that Eggs himself had committed a series of grisly murders under the influence of Maryann’s powers doesn’t help matters, particularly when Tara finds out that Sookie had used her telepathy to “help” Eggs remember the macabre events. After hearing ditzy, unabashedly bigoted waitress Arlene (Carrie Preston) recount her version of Eggs’ shooting to the police, Tara rips her a new one — prompting one of the funniest lines of dialogue in the entire episode, courtesy of Arlene: “I’m sorry you fell in love with a serial killer, but seriously? Who here hasn’t?” Only in the twisted, sordid swamp of Bon Temps (and mind of creator Alan Ball) does Arlene’s statement carry actual weight and genuine humor.

Meanwhile, Andy is convincing Jason to uphold his reputation as a brainless womanizer to thwart any suspicion of his role in Eggs’ death, giving him the mantra “a lot less conscience, and a lot more cojones” to solidify his immunity. As a detective, Andy knows his self-defense “confession” is full of holes obvious to most competent police officers, but Sheriff Dearborne’s (William Sanderson) investigative skills are waning as time goes on, and Andy thinks the case is open-and-shut as long as dimwitted Jason doesn’t blow their cover. “Why’d you tell him a story with holes in it?!” whines Jason to an exasperated Andy. This might be even tougher than Andy thinks.

Still searching for any signs of Bill, Sookie heads to vamp bar Fangtasia to interrogate Bill’s nemesis Eric Northman (Alexander Skarsgard) on any knowledge of his whereabouts. After discovering Eric in a, um, compromising position with a female companion, Sookie is pleasantly surprised to learn it is Eric’s duty as vampire sheriff to look for Bill despite their tense relationship. Immediately, we learn Bill is still stuck in the same careening automobile with the same increasingly unhinged crew of kidnappers. After managing to take control of the vehicle and run it off the road, Bill escapes and summons his “daughter” Jessica (still tormented over how to deal with the trucker’s rapidly decaying body — eww) to give him assistance.

Just in time to not be completely forgotten about, Sam Merlotte and his quest to find his family pop back on screen to remind us just how many subplots this show can juggle at once. We spend enough time with Sam in a small Arkansas town to see him discover his incognito brother and biological parents’ house before he disappears to allow more characters to reintroduce themselves and their significance. Particularly, vampire Queen of Louisiana, Sophie Anne (the talented Evan Rachel Wood, laying it on a bit thick here) arrives at Fangtasia with the Magister (an excellent cameo from Damages’ Zeljko Ivanek) to discuss the epidemic of “V” (vampire blood — it has a hallucinogenic, ecstasy-like effect on humans) dealing in the region. What the Magister doesn’t know, but is beginning to suspect, is that Sophie Anne herself is in cahoots with Eric to sell a boatload of V through Tara’s cousin, the fabulous Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis). Eric’s assistant Pam then threatens Lafayette to move all of the remaining product by the next morning to cover their tracks and keep the Magister’s wrath at bay.

Back in Bon Temps, Sookie figures out that Bill has the ability to summon Jessica and helps the newbie vamp figure out where to find him. By the time they reach the crash site of the kidnappers’ vehicle, Bill has already healed his own wounds and regained his strength to meet his abductors face to face. Finally, the pinnacle of the episode occurs at the very last second (a True Blood trademark) when Bill encounters a pack of wolves thirsty for revenge. Indeed, a new set of supernatural beings are being added to the already-diverse True Blood mythical menagerie: Werewolves! Upon mutual recognition, Bill verbally addresses his opponents: “I should warn you — I fed.”

While the storytelling style of the episode could have incorporated a calmer approach, this season premiere bustled with promising new endeavors for the characters and set up the basis for a fantastic upcoming season. Personally, I’m looking forward to the hilariously sordid ventures of Sookie Stackhouse and her crew, particularly with an entirely new species being thrown into the mix. Don’t let the werewolves trick you into thinking this is becoming a watered-down, Twilight-friendly, glittering sea of abstinence and teenage angst, folks. True Blood in two short seasons has already created a fantastically entertaining, empirically adult show for those who like their vampires with a little bit of bite. Yum.

Season 3, Episode 1: Bad Blood (originally aired June 13, 2010)

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Photographs courtesy of HBO and IMDbPro