Supernatural Review: The Truth Shall Set You Free, If Free Means Death

In this week’s episode of Supernatural, Dean and Sam find themselves dealing with a bizarre set of murder/suicides where the people involved are unable to say anything but the cruel truth to a person leading them to kill others and then themselves.

The opening scene shows a young waitress having a hard day. She’s on the phone with someone when she says that she wants to learn the truth, which begins a chain of events where her boss, customers, and her own sister tell her cruel things. The waitress then takes a small pistol out of a desk drawer and proceeds to shoot herself. Then a dentist decides to drill his patient to death after the man reveals that he sexually molested the dentist’s daughter. The dentist kills himself soon after as well.

The brothers’ investigation first leads them to believe that they are dealing with Gabriel’s horn of truth. But Cas appears to Dean and checks out the town, unable to find the horn anywhere. Dean is still pissed off that Cas isn’t helping him figure out what’s wrong with Sam, but the angel sticks to his guns and is unable to explain what is happening to the younger Winchester. Still Cas does offer to help and says he’ll make his inquiries.

Dean is trying his best to appear normal when he’s going out of his mind trying to figure out if Sam is still Sam or if it’s something else. Cas tells him that it’s not old Lucifer, so it must be some new ailment that has Sammy smirk when the waitress’s sister confesses that she had said go kill yourself to her own sister.

As the dead bodies begin to disappear though, the brothers discover that they are up against Veritas, goddess of truth. Dean accidentally invokes the curse while drinking at a bar when he says, “I’d just like the freaking truth.” Immediately thereafter the bartender and a woman wearing a low cut dress begin telling him exactly what’s on their minds. He calls Bobby up to test if it works over the phone and things get a little TMI for Dean’s comfort. The silver lining though is that he now sees the curse as an opportunity to get the real truth from Sam once and for all. Before that though Lisa finally returns his call and she confirms Dean’s thoughts on being unable to keep them in his life because of the nature of his world. Lisa is furious that he had pushed Ben and tells him that Sam and he have an unhealthy relationship and that he’ll never be happy as long as his brother is in his life.

When Dean finally confronts Sam, the younger Winchester tells him that he froze and that’s why he let Dean get turned into a vampire. Dean appears to take this explanation, for now.

They figure out that Veritas is moonlighting as a local television reporter and make their way to her house, which is crawling with cats. They find the dead bodies in her swanky basement and Veritas manages to knock them out and then tie them up. She begins to explain how her favorite part of the human body is the tongue because of all the lies that goes through it as they are spoken. She cuts out the tongue from a dead body and takes a big bite.

Dean is forced to say that he feels better about his brother now from wanting to kill him in his sleep because he has been unsure about Sam. When Veritas tries to get Sam to tell the truth we find out the big twist, he can lie to her! She is horrified and screams that he’s not human because no one should be able to do that. Sam breaks free of the ropes and gets into a scuffle with the goddess only to be rescued by Dean in the nick of time. The elder Winchester though is back on the defense because he knows Sam lied to him.

Sam, under the threat of a bloody mini saw being wielded by his brother, says that he has been unable to feel any emotion since returning from the cage but that has made him a better hunter. He pleads for help and Dean begins to lower the weapon. But just when you think Dean has bought this explanation, he beats Sam until the younger man looses consciousness. Sam is just as agile and strong as Dean and he could have defended himself against the attack. But why didn’t he? Was he taking the beating to make Dean trust him? We still don’t know what’s wrong with him but at least now we know he’s no longer human.

Jensen and Jared continue to do a superb job in showing us new Dean and new Sam. It’s the subtle nuances they add to their characters that make their performances believable. Dean continues to struggle to make sense of his life having to deal with bizzaro Sam and the family he built with Lisa and Ben. Bizzaro Sam in the meantime seems to be on the verge of showing his cruelness with every new smirk.

This was a solid episode that continues to drive the plot forward. I have never particularly warmed up to Lisa and Ben but they are valid means of character development for Dean. I wish we’d get more of what’s going on in heaven and hell, but I’m guessing we’ll find out more during sweeps. I also like this non-whiney, possibly evil Sam. I can’t wait till we learn what actually happened to him. Maybe Grandpa Campbell will be able to help; I’m guessing that’s where Dean is going to take Sam.

Season 6, Episode 6: You Can’t Handle the Truth (originally aired October 29, 2010)

Fridays at 9/8C on The CW

Images courtesy of The CW and Jack Rowand.

Paranormal Activity 2: Same Tactics, More Scares

This October Paranormal Activity 2 hit theaters bringing audiences the sequel to 2009′s biggest horror movie. Riding off the success of the original, Paranormal Activity 2 offers viewers “more of the same” with the replication of initial film’s style. Depending on whether you loved or hated the first movie, your likely response for the sequel will be more or less the same.

What’s The Story and What’s Changed?

Paranormal Activity 2 is both a prequel and a sequel to the events of the original movie as the time line of both movies overlap. In PA2 viewers follow the story of Katie’s sister, Kristi Rey and her family as they slowly experience the increasing paranormal activity that takes place throughout the house. Unlike the original movie’s one camera setup, PA2 is shot using multiple cameras. After returning home and finding the entire house trashed, Dan Rey, Kristi’s husband, decides to have surveillance cameras set up throughout the house. With the cameras’ setup, there are no blind spots allowing for an optimal spook experience. The family’s hand-held cameras also add to the addition of cameras.

Story Spoilers:

Audiences get a look into why both Kristi and Katie have been haunted by the demon. It turns out their great-grandmother made a deal with a demon to get rich quick, but in exchange she must give up the first male child born to her family. Nearly a century later, Hunter, the first born male in the family’s bloodline, is born to Kristi and the demon is back to collect. End of Spoilers

Is It Scary?

As the movie progresses, the violent nature of the demon’s behavior increases just as it did in the original tale. This brings up the age old question for any horror movie. Is it scary? The answer to this really comes down to a few factors. If the first movie scared you, then the sequel will definitely amplify your reaction. Were you bored out of your mind and laughing throughout the first? You probably will be doing the same come the second movie.

What was my reaction to the scary scenes?

Tension grew within me when the rumbling started to occur. You know, the ominous “Oh Shit! Something’s about to happen” sound. Some scary scenes made me laugh, while others made me jump in my chair. I’ll say this much, I’m never sitting in the kitchen home alone ever again.

 

What I Didn’t Like

While the characters are a lot more likable this time around, they are still a bunch of idiots. The dad especially. How blind can you be when you have proof staring you right in your face?

The crowd. I have no idea why everyone who goes to see any horror movie completely loses function of their speech. I don’t want your damn commentary and I’m pretty sure no one else wants to hear it either. I understand laughing, screaming, and freaking out at a scene. That is fine, but do us all a favor and be quiet. A movie like Paranormal Activity 2 is very atmospheric and it only takes one loud mouth to ruin the experience. Best bet, go really late at night when most kids aren’t around. They seem to be the most common repeat offenders when it comes to talking in movies.

Final Verdict

I enjoyed Paranormal Activity 2 for its horror and suspense. While it didn’t scare me outright, it did provide a fun evening of shock and suspense at the theater. It is definitely above par for a horror movie. Also I do recommend watching the original to get a better understanding of the movie.

For those that loved the first movie – Watch.

For those that hated the first movie – Avoid.

For those that haven’t seen the first, but looking for a fun watch – Watch with friends who are easily scared.

Hornets’ Nest Review: This Hornet Could Use a Little More Sting

The most ardent fans of the late Stieg Larsson’s gripping Millennium trilogy will no doubt make it a point to see the film adaptation of the wildly successful novel series’ final installment, The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest, now out in select cities. Like many movie versions of popular books, voracious readers tend to flock to theaters in droves, anxious to compare the literary events to the cinematically altered ones. For those who simply enjoy the movies themselves, however, the startling lack of now-iconic heroine Lisbeth Salander (Noomi Rapace, again giving Rooney Mara pretty big shoes to fill) in the crowning chapter will likely be an unwelcome surprise. Instead, Larsson’s antisocial hacking genius takes a backseat to let the conspiracy surrounding her abusive childhood unfold and take center stage to bring the series full circle. The involvement of Lisbeth’s lifelong, smarmy psychiatrist with a covert government operation — whose deception runs deeper than either she or hard-nosed journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Michael Nyqvist) could have fathomed – would prove a wrenching subplot on its own, but instead seems to distract from the compelling characters Larsson crafted in the earlier books.

Hornet’s Nest picks up right where the preceding chapter, The Girl Who Played With Fire, left off as Lisbeth is whisked into emergency brain surgery following multiple gunshot wounds at the hand of her estranged father, Alexander Zalachenko. She now faces charges of attempted murder after planting an axe in his head in self-defense. Blomkvist, meanwhile, is hard at work producing a special issue of his glossy, investigative news magazine, Millennium, devoted to exposing the corrupt environment that wrongfully institutionalized Lisbeth as an adolescent. The professional and personal spark between Blomkvist and Salander that helped make the first film, The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, a romantically twisted, engrossing thriller is sadly absent in Hornet’s Nest, as the dynamic duo their share their scarcest amount of screen time yet.

The majority of the story is devoted to the deterioration and exposure of The Section, a secret division of Swedish government designed to protect such clandestine goons as Soviet defector Zalachenko, and apparently make his daughter’s life a living hell in order to protect his identity. While Lisbeth spends most of the movie’s exposition recovering in an intensive care unit, Blomkvist risks both his career and his life to exonerate her and halt The Section’s ruthless exploitation of power.

He enlists the help of his sister Annika, a defense attorney, and Plague, Lisbeth’s only known friend and fellow hacker extraordinaire, to help shed a light on the injustice wreaked upon Lisbeth throughout her life. Blomkvist even smuggles a smart phone into the hospital to communicate with Lisbeth and give her an opportunity to compose her autobiography in time for her court hearing. Her sympathetic surgeon keeps insisting to the police she isn’t well enough for an interrogation, and his handy stall tactics help both Lisbeth and Blomkvist bide some time to cement their case.

In the meantime, various players within The Section discuss the liability of Zalachenko and his troublesome daughter and devise an assassination plot to eliminate both of them from the equation. When this feeble attempt implodes, The Section’s overwhelming demographic of angry, aging white men wax philosophical on Lisbeth’s tale, one going so far as to remark her life is “like a Greek tragedy.” To wit, Lisbeth’s mute, deranged, towheaded Frankenstein monster of a half-brother, Niedermann, is indeed on the loose and calculating his revenge with every silent, blood-lustful stare. His intermittent appearances remind me of a cross between Javier Bardem’s Anton Chigurh of No Country For Old Men and Peter Stormare’s Nordic thug in Fargo.

Director Daniel Alfredson saturates his film with talky pith that manages to simultaneously run the clock and evoke a nostalgic longing for the earlier chapters’ focus on Lisbeth and her system-bucking ethos. The climactic courtroom showdown between Lisbeth and her vile childhood therapist finally give her the spotlight, as she’s seen preparing for the trial by doing pushups in her jail cell and perfecting her mohawk with the swagger of a waifish Travis Bickle. The sequence is a welcome deviation from the plodding dialogue that seemed both sterile and repetitive in many scenes, but even at a bloated 148 minutes, The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest proves a worthy enough conclusion to satisfy even the most meticulous Larsson enthusiasts.

 

 

SAW 3D Review: Trappings of Blood, Guts, and Gore

Another deadly game and new series of grizzly traps with more mutilated bodies than survivors opened this weekend with Saw 3D. This is the latest film in the Saw franchise that continues the story of the Jigsaw murders with a new slew of unfortunate victims.

The movie focuses on Jill Tuck (Betsy Russell), the wife of now deceased John Kramer (the original Jigsaw) and his successor, former police officer Mark Hoffman, played by Costas Mandylor. At the end of Saw VI, Jill puts a reverse bear trap device on Hoffman’s head planning to kill him, but he is able to escape and intends to hunt Jigsaw’s wife down. Hoffman sets up a new game with self-help guru Bobby Dagen (Sean Patrick Flanery), whose book on surviving Jigsaw’s trap has become a national best seller. Dagen’s wife, publicist, lawyer and manager are all set up in various traps inside an old abandoned mental facility.

Meanwhile Jill has come to police internal affairs officer Matt Gibson (Chad Donella) to turn Hoffman in provided she gets full immunity from prosecution and protection. Gibson agrees just as bodies begin popping up. Hoffman sends Gibson a video recorded message saying that he’s set up a new game and it’ll stop if he gets Jill in exchange. Gibson refuses though and first puts Jill up in a safe house and when that fails locks up her inside a jail for safety.

One of my favorite parts of this film is the opening where we see what happens to Jigsaw’s very first victim, Dr. Lawrence Gordon (played by Cary Elwes) who had sawed off his own foot to save his family (who survived). We see him crawling on the hallway where he manages to cauterize his severed limb by putting it on a steaming hot pipe. We see Gordon again in a Jigsaw survivor support group led by Dagen that is being filmed for a DVD the author is going to sell to the masses. We also learn that Elwes’ character has actually played a big role behind the scenes throughout the entire series.

Without spoiling any more of the story, what makes Saw 3D interesting is the hidden twists and the eventual justice that the bad characters get. From the beginning people were being morally tested because they had committed wrong acts in their lives. This form of justice can be seen as far back in human history during ancient Babylonian times with Hammurabi’s Code where the core principle was eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, a fitting punishment for a given crime. The victims of the traps have to endure pain because they’ve caused pain.

All the traps were gruesome for a viewer like me who doesn’t regularly watch slasher flicks. In the aftermath, you could tell that the bodies were dolls but I thought all the actors did a convincing job in portraying the utter fear they felt and of course screaming their lungs off. Particularly great job to the victims of the first trap, a woman who had been manipulating two men at the same time to fulfill her own selfish needs.

This was a purely gore driven film that I would recommend you rent rather than seeing it on the big screen, in 3D nonetheless. The 3D aspect didn’t really do anything to enhance the viewing experience as so many others of the same ilk. The best parts were more due to the camera angles and the terrified screams of fear with impending spikes or flesh being ripped than from flying 3D projectiles. I found myself grossed out and gripped by the kinds of traps the victims endured hoping that they make it out alive. Throughout the movie I wondered how I would react if trapped in one of these contraptions myself, would I survive?

Saw 3D is a good addition to the franchise, but nothing remarkable. If you liked the series, you’ll enjoy this latest one as well and if you’ve never seen any of it, the blood, guts, and gore will be entertaining. You might even get curious how this whole thing started and want the in-depth back-story, in which case a marathon might be in order.

It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia Review: Dee’s Halloweenie

It’s 5:30 on a Saturday evening at Paddy’s pub in Philadelphia, and Mac, Charlie and Dennis are eagerly discussing their intent to spend the night in the city’s history museum to see what shenanigans unfold. Apparently inspired by the Ben Stiller movie Night at the Museum, the three amigos list the exhibits they’re most excited to see “come alive” as Dee listens in with visible skepticism. She finally voices her incredulity in between generous bites of a sandwich, but is curtly shot down by Dennis as he claims it doesn’t matter whether they encounter “Charlie’s ancient spirits or end up running from security guards all night.” The pursuit of adventure is the ultimate objective. So suck it, Dee!

The guys use this moment to deflect attention from their highly delusional (not to mention childish and illegal) plans to take notice at Dee’s mutating waistline. As they tease her for her recent increased interest in food and the undeniable result thereof, Dee drops a bombshell and announces she isn’t getting fat – she’s pregnant. While Kaitlin Olson must be relieved to finally be able to stop hiding from behind the bar and holding random objects in front of her belly to disguise her real-life pregnancy, her character is instead miffed that the guys don’t seem to give a hoot about her upcoming motherhood. To up the ante, she tells them they should start caring, because the conception occurred at Paddy’s infamously belligerent Halloween party and one of them is the father. Cue the predictably succinct and explanatory credits, which ask the question the entire episode is dedicated to answering: “Who Got Dee Pregnant?”

Mac, Charlie and Dennis enlist the help of Frank to help solve the budding mystery as the foursome sits down to discuss the fuzzy and fragmented events on All Hallow’s Eve. While Dee is visibly a few months along, the multiple flashbacks to that fateful evening provide a welcome timeliness that isn’t often utilized on Sunny. The Halloween party was evidently a night of drunken debauchery for the entire Gang as the episode shows each character’s memory of the party in amusingly different lights. Mac says he can’t remember the party too well because he had a “brownout,” which is a level of intoxication less severe than a full-on blackout, but intense enough to hinder one’s ability to recall certain events. Dennis digs the new term and vows to incorporate it into common vernacular – I’m surprised it hasn’t been already.

The guys begin to compile their respective brownouts in order to piece together the course of the evening and hopefully figure out who Dee slept with at the party. As it becomes more and more clear that each person’s own particular brownout and narcissistic tendencies render their memories of the night unreliable, the episode unfolds itself like a lowbrow, theatrical game of telephone.

Dennis begins by expressing resentment toward Mac for ditching their plans to dress as Mario and Luigi. Poor Dennis is left to look like a cartoonish Italian plumber all by himself, while Charlie manages to thwart his own intentions to dress as a vampire by accidentally donning a Phantom of the Opera getup instead, mask and all. Frank has squeezed himself into a Spider-Man outfit (or, Man-Spider, as he later corrects) Mac is dressed as “that dude from Lord of the Rings, ‘Viggo Morgenstein,’” and Dee is sporting a sexy angel look. The guys immediately give her a hard time for choosing a costume that incorporates wings, since her bird-like appearance provides enough material for them to mercilessly tease her as it is. The guys, Dennis in particular, notice a comely blonde across the room actually dressed as a bird – a peacock to be exact – and commence their usual Cro-Magnon mating rituals to Dee’s chagrin.

While Dennis’ distortion of reality causes him to think he’s hitting it off with Miss Peacock, she’s actually in the process of telling him off when Charlie tearfully sputters toward them with an unintelligible claim that his costume is “too sexy,” and his “friend” is “sexing [him] up.” Dennis realizes he and the inebriated, but apparently laid, Charlie need to switch costumes so he’ll have a better chance at impressing his female target. Given these “memories,” Dennis concludes Charlie was “sexed up” by his “friend” Dee, and Dennis himself must have eventually closed the deal with the peacock lady if he ended up wearing Charlie’s foolproof, lady-killing outfit. Mystery solved!

Wrong, says Charlie, as he throws in his muddled two cents. He’d actually been shedding tears of joy because he ended up making out with The Waitress after punching her date in the face as Mac joined in and the creepy, milk-drinking McPoyle twins looked on. In Charlie’s version of events, the brothers are caught in the crossfire of Mac and Charlie’s brawl and end up splashing a glass of milk all over Dee, who quickly retreats to the restroom to clean up. Given this new information, Charlie reasons he couldn’t possibly be the father of Dee’s unborn child.

Frank puts the kibosh on this theory, arguing that Charlie hadn’t made out with The Waitress, but actually Frank’s sometimes lover, Artemis. According to Frank’s recollection, Artemis swooped in on Charlie after The Waitress and her date fled the scene in disgust with his drunken belligerence. Frank insists Artemis planted one on Charlie to make Frank jealous, however, given their tumultuous relationship. In light of Frank’s revelation, the guys decide to call Artemis and invite her down to Paddy’s to set the record straight.

Although she says she doesn’t remember “most nights,” including the party, Artemis does offer helpful insight into the guys’ shoddy detective work. After Dee retreated to the bathroom to wash the milk off of her costume, Mac followed suit to clean the blood off of his knuckles from his involvement in the scuffle. Dee had apparently been in the men’s room to avoid a line for the ladies’, and Artemis herself heard the unmistakable sound of figurative boots figuratively knocking mere moments later. Just when it seems the case is closed, Mac’s obvious embarrassment gives way to his reluctant confession that he hadn’t slept with Dee in the bathroom – he’d had a run-in with Margaret McPoyle, the equally creepy deaf-mute sister of the twins, after shooing Dee away. For shame!

Now, the guys realize they must confirm Mac’s story with the McPoyle twins themselves, especially since they’d been drinking milk that whole fateful night and were likely the only people there who could’ve passed a breathalyzer test.  They head over to the McPoyles’ creepy lair, where the brothers are both wearing shabby terry cloth bathrobes and holding their ubiquitous glasses of milk. Despite their undeniably off-putting demeanor, the twins’ sobriety means they have the most reliable recollection of the evening. To Charlie’s dismay, it turns out the woman whose boyfriend he (poorly) attempted to pummel wasn’t even The Waitress (ha!) at all, but an innocent, unknown patron. Also, Mac’s attempt to back up his friend in the needless fight only resulted in sloppily bumping into the twins, which caused them to spill their milk all over Dee. The brothers then express squirm-inducing delight at the one correct conclusion the guys came up with: Mac did indeed have sex with lip-licking Margaret in Paddy’s run-down bathroom. With the story now set relatively straight, both the guys and me have had enough of the McPoyles for one evening.

The titular mystery of the episode remains unsolved, however, and the brothers do offer one last pertinent piece of info as they recall Dee accosting Miss Peacock with drunken jealousy. Dee proposes switching costumes to give Dee the chance to feel like the hot chick, while the actual hot chick can have a break from the leering idiots who haven’t left her alone all night (ahem, Dennis). Plus, Dee tells her, if they switch costumes, “I won’t beat the shit out of you.” There you have it. As Dee prances about the party in her new outfit, she’s proud as a you-know-what and uses her newfound confidence to grab the first guy she sees and lure him into the office. According to the McPoyle brothers’ reliable memory, the guy Dee grabbed was Charlie in his Phantom costume…but wait! The guys make the sickening realization that Charlie and Dennis had already switched costumes by then, meaning Dee had grabbed Dennis in the Phantom getup, not Charlie, and the siblings were already too deep in their respective brownouts to recognize one another. Clearly, Dee thought she was with Charlie and Dennis thought he had actually scored with Miss Peacock. As Dennis begins to hurl with disgust, the McPoyles offer satisfied smirks and a deadpan “delightful,” in unison.

The guys scramble over to Dee’s and nearly pound down her door. When she finally answers, she looks justifiably bemused at their frantic rehashing of the events leading up to this horrible discovery. Dee laughs with impunity and tells the guys that none of them are the father and she had only told them otherwise to drive them crazy. Evidently, it worked. Besides, she says, just because she dragged Dennis into the office at the party doesn’t mean she slept with him, for crying out loud. Gross, guys! They are relieved to know they’re all off the hook, particularly Dennis, and they proceed to retreat back into their self-involved ways and claim to Dee they’re back to not caring about her pregnancy or the identity of the father. If it isn’t one of them, they reason, why would they? The episode closes with Charlie, Mac, Dennis and Frank recommencing their plans to spend the night at the museum and awaken ancient relics.

I found this episode the most enjoyable and old school Sunny of the season, as the roundabout, flashback-heavy storytelling tactics managed to bring back recurring characters from the entire series and utilize the zany writing to its sharpest degree. I had the pleasure to watch this episode at San Diego Comic-Con in July, and I was pleased to view it again during its intended airtime. The Halloween theme was pleasantly pertinent, and subtle recurring gags throughout the episode helped break up the heavier, more sadistic humor. I particularly liked the recurring joke of Dee growing more and more literally bird-like as the guys’ recollections continued; she started out the evening in an angel costume, then appeared with feathers, then a beak, and finally as a full-blown ostrich in Mac’s memory of their brief encounter in the restroom. Lighthearted humor such as this mixed with the irreverent shock value of an incest revelation makes the provocative storylines funnier and more surprising than if just used alone for the sake of being controversial. While we still don’t know who got Dee pregnant, this episode of Sunny is such a standout on its own, I’m not sure it even matters in the long run.

Season 6, Episode 7: Who Got Dee Pregnant? (originally aired October 28, 2010)

For more on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, click here.

Thursdays at 10pm on FX

Photographs courtesy of FX and IMDbPro

The Vampire Diaries Review: Skip the Teen Drama – Get to It

On last week’s episode of The Vampire Diaries things really got rough with the killing of Mason, the stabbing of Jenna, and the breakup of Elena and Stefan and in this week’s follow-up almost no time is wasted in hatching a revenge ploy with one goal – kill Katherine. And I must say Damon and Stefan muster a pretty kickass team to take her on including their newest vampire recruit, Caroline, the helpful Alaric, the reluctant witch Bonnie, and a revenge hungry but still adorable Jeremy.

A team like that should technically be capable of anything and easily take down anyone but Katherine isn’t just anyone and she has help. She now has her own witch friend, Lucy (Natashia Williams), and plenty of Plan Bs thanks to a bevy of spells that Lucy brings to the table.

All of these players converge on the annual Lockwood masquerade ball where the good guys hope that Katherine will easily fall into their death trap. And for awhile they get lucky. Katherine walks right into the designated room where Damon and Stefan immediately pounce and begin the coolest fight sequence that this series has yet to deliver. What they don’t know though is that Elena (who shows up unexpectedly) is experiencing all of the injuries and pain that Katherine experiences. Think of a voodoo doll without the use of a doll. If you stab Katherine, a similar wound appears on Elena. If you kick Katherine in the teeth, Elena gets a sore mouth. I could go on forever but you probably get the idea.

Jeremy manages to stop the boys from killing Katherine (and therefore Elena too) so then they stand around for awhile trying to figure out what to do next. Meanwhile, Lucy and Bonnie run into each other and immediately sense that the other is a witch, but Lucy also senses that Bonnie is the one holding the moonstone. So in a quick little arm grab thingy she controls Bonnie into giving her the moonstone for what we assume will be nefarious purposes. What we don’t see on screen though is the bond that she discovers within Bonnie and instead of playing along with Katherine’s evil plan, she breaks the spell on Elena that has her linked to Katherine and instead puts a spell on the moonstone that suffocates Katherine when she touches it.

Poor Katherine slumps to the floor lifelessly in what may have been the most anti-climatic “death” scene ever. But in true vampire fashion she isn’t dead. Instead, Damon seals her in the tomb that she will presumably escape from in the spring sweeps period. Until then, Katherine, we will miss you.

But it’s not as if Katherine didn’t leave a few gifts in her wake. If you’ll remember at the end of last week’s episode she compelled Matt to fight Tyler until Tyler kills him which will finally turn him into a werewolf. Matt does his duty well but Caroline jumps in to stop the fight and therefore saves both of them. But as always, Katherine had a Plan B in the form of some random girl who steps in to attack Tyler too only to get pushed away and hit her head on a table. This fall kills her and before you can say “Teen Wolf,” Tyler becomes what he’s always destined to be – a werewolf! He doesn’t really do any damage in this first go round as a wolf and Caroline helps cover for him with the authorities but it’s safe to say we’ll be seeing a lot of trouble from him in the future.

The episode ends with a few rapid developments including the fact that Lucy and Bonnie are related (it’s apparently not a coincidence that the only African Americans on this show portray witches), Stefan and Elena remain broken up, Jeremy has the hots for Bonnie, and someone kidnaps Elena! I can’t wait to see who it was! Might Uncle John be back? Or is it someone new? Let the epic November sweeps episodes begin!

Season 2, Episode 7: Masquerade (originally aired October 28, 2010)

For more on The Vampire Diaries, click here.

Thursdays at 8/7c on The CW

Photographs courtesy of The CW, Quantrell Colbert

Project Runway Review: Oh How the Mighty Have Fallen!

This has not been the worst season of Project Runway (that distinction belongs to the suckfest that was Season 6) but this has definitely been one of the most unfulfilling as far as fashion, design, and entertainment go. Project Runway concludes season 8 with a whopping 2-HOUR season finale filled with dead air, lackluster fashion and a surprising (and totally undeserved) winner.

The first 20 minutes of Project Runway reunites all the eliminated contestants for an uncomfortable look at the previous season. I say uncomfortable because it is physically painful to sit through a montage of the struggling season and I refuse to pretend that any of these designers have anything important enough to say that I should waste my time on. And indeed, there isn’t anything new or groundbreaking in this segment. I am resentful of Project Runway wasting my time on this so I won’t waste any of yours.

What you’re really here for is the fashion. The designers do their final fittings, Mondo has horrible trouble with his models (he can’t seem to keep hold of them) and Andy is so blinded with love of his collection that he dismisses valuable advice from Tim.

At the final runway at Fashion Week, Jessica Simpson is the guest judge.

Gretchen is the first to show her collection, “Running through Thunder.” A couple of her pieces are interesting, although they are the same “blah” brown in color. She has this one belted thigh-high jacket of this green, shiny leather, accented in yellow, and paired over briefs. It is a very modern, expensive resort wear look that you wouldn’t see anywhere other than a runway. This is the most striking piece in an otherwise bland collection, although this should not be enough to clinch her a victory. The problem with Gretchen’s collection is that all her looks are average and already being sold at your local Macy’s outlet. There is no extravagance in her design.

Andy show’s next, his collection is inspired by his Lao heritage and dedicated to his mother. It is a combination of silver and green. And while this works sometimes, many times it does not. One of his designs has this muddied silver top and short green shorts, and while on the whole there is nothing truly offensive about this outfit, there is nothing remarkable about it either. The starkness of the colors just emphasizes the plainness of the outfit. Contrary to Andy’s promise to the judges, there was no signature gown to show the range in his collection. This upsets me because Michael C. would have had a gown in his collection. Sour grapes, I know, get over it, but it still stings.

Mondo is last to present his collection, which is inspired by his Mexican heritage and is a self-reflection of everything that brings him joy. Mondo’s collection is full of his patented patterns. It’s funky with tons of personality. The one problem would probably be that ALL of his designs have wacky patterns. While he did have one solid black dress, this look was cut before the runway. I would have loved to see a striking one-tone dress from Mondo because I’m sure he’d compensate in other ways.

At the judging panel, Andy was praised his for “sassy” looks, although Michael felt that the collection did not have a lot of diversity. Nina thinks Andy went a little over with the oriental theme and thinks he should have made his look more edgy and modern. Andy is the first out.

Nina thought Gretchen did a fantastic job; she was impressed with her choice of fabric and print, but wished Gretchen added a “dash” of color to her monotone looks. Heidi loved the “feel” of the show but thought the prints were repetitive, while Jessica wondered how many pieces would actually translate into consumer sales.

Michael praised Mondo for having looks that were eye-catching and dramatic. All the judges liked his use of print, though Nina thought he went overboard in adding decoration and Michael thought that Mondo’s constant print needed the relief of skin (ie. shorter outfits). Nina thought that Mondo’s collection looked very young, and cautioned him that he needed to add sophistication to his looks. Jessica said that like a true designer, Mondo made a unique collection that no one else could make.

Between these two designers Mondo has been on top for the majority of the season, but in the end it’s the final runway that counts and Mondo’s “young” designs were told to take a hike. Gretchen is named the winner.

This is a complete shock and an undeserved (IMO) win, yet it is very fitting that this season, which started off strong and sunk into a spiral of decline, ends in this horrible, horrible manner. Project Runway has clearly lost its mind, so until it finds its strut again, that’s peace out for me.

But what about you? Are you happy with Gretchen’s big win and just counting the days until it comes to an Outlet store near you? Or do you think that Andy or Mondo should have walked away with this one?

Season 8, Episode 14: Finale Part 2 (originally aired October 28, 2010)

For more on Project Runway, click here. You can follow Poptimal on Twitter @poptimal.

Thursdays at 9pm EST on Lifetime

Photographs courtesy of Lifetime.

Review: Tommy Can You Hear Me? Week 6 is “Rockin” on “Dancing With the Stars”

“Tommy (Bergeron), can you hear me? Tommy, can you see me? Tommy, can you feel me?” Okay, that last line was just creepy. I take that one back. But not the others. The other song lyrics from The Who  shall remain, in a vain and sad attempt by me to reconnect with Mr. Bergeron. What better time than rock and roll week on Dancing With the Stars to rekindle that ole flame between genius TV host and his delusional stalker? What can I say Tom – I am desperate. You did not leave a comment on last week’s review, and, unless I was imagining things, you did not deliver your usual “LIIVVEEE!!!!” yelp at the beginning of the show either. Since we all know that is your special private message to me, I am feeling a bit snubbed.

But enough about me and Tom. Tom and I. There is rock and roll to get to! Well, if you consider dudes that look like they’re from 1987 playing electric guitar atop a stage filled with constant exploding flames and a weird Hollywood Squares looking set … rock and roll. Apparently this is DWTS bizarre version of rock and roll, so hey, let’s just go with it.

1. Audrina / Tony:

Danced a Paso Doble to Another One Bites the Dust. Very strange all around. Didn’t seem to make much sense. The dancing didn’t match the music at all; which didn’t match the costumes at all; which didn’t match their characters. Wait, let me rephrase that. Audrina has no “characters” since she is not capable of human expression or acting. If she was playing the part of a mannequin with possessed glossy eyes, she would be a genius. But that is not what is happening here, and she is the furthest thing from genius. Speaking of genius, Brooke Burke standing next to Audrina  during the post-interview was very humorous. I caught a glimpse of Brooke’s balloon boobs, and then noticed the skin around the fake boobs of Audrina starting to look like it was melting. Deflating. Suffice it to say, her boobs have more personality than her. At least they change shape; her eyes remain glossed over. As you can see, I am not capable of liking this chick at all, nor of being fair to her. She annoys me. The judges disagree. Scores: 8/8/8

2. Kyle / Lacey:

Dancing a Tango, these two always seem to have weird distracting costumes. No dumpy pants this week, but instead we got giant bizarre shoulder pad thingys that cannot be explained, but looked totally in the way. Other than that, they did well, and seemed much improved overall. A very good energy. The judges loved them so much, that Bruno even did his thing where he stands up and moves his hands all over the place out of pure excitement. I love it when Bruno can’t stay seated. Scores: 8/7/8

3.  Jennifer / Derek:

Paso Doble. I liked this dance. True, it was not their strongest and they falted a tiny bit at the very end, but it was still very good. Filled with intensity, energy, and quick tough movements, the dance seemed challenging and fun. Jennifer is everything that Audrina is not. She has wonderful expression in her eyes, and that radiates all the way down to her toes. When they were finished, the judges acted as if they had just commited a violent murder upon their families. They were WAY too harsh with them, especially horny Carrie Anne, who called Jennifer “out of control” and told her that she is going “downhill” on the show. WHAT? Is this woman serious? How about throwing a little …just a LITTLE…bit of that random anger Brisol Palin’s way? I realize they expect a lot of Jen because she is very good, but c’mon. Carrie Anne’s scores were MUCH too low for what was essentially an above average dance with one minor hiccup. Scores: 6/7/7

NOTE: During the post -interview, Burke tried to put down her stupid index cards with her lines on them for a minute, and failed miserably. Derek started to say something about Jennifer to the effect of “I was surprised that she ….” , and Burke chimed in with, ” she failed you?” … awkward silence. Ummm, no, you idiot. Please dont ever improvise again. Read your dumb cue cards and keep asking everyone “How does that feel?” over and over. Its okay. Your role is to look pretty in way too tight dresses.

4. Rick / Cheryl:

During the rehearsal footage for their Tango, Rick The Sweatmonster reached a whole new level of sweaty. It was just dripping off of him in every scene of that montage clip. Holy Sweatdrops! I believe at one point I saw sweat coming out of his eyeballs and earlobes. That man can SWEAT! Great song choice of Van Halen’s You Got Me - but again, the music didnt seem to go with their movements at all. Still, I did like their dance, and my husband’s affair with Cheryl Burke (in his mind) continues. Scores: 8/8/8

5. Bristol / Mark:

In the rehearsals for this Tango, they made a VERY big deal about putting a fun “air guitar” section into the number. Then, when they actually did it, it was literally about 2 seconds long. If you blinked, you missed it. That was it? Okay then. That being said, this was probably Bristol’s strongest dance yet. I didn’t love it by any means, and I still think she looks like a sausage stuffed into its casing and being dragged across a skillet against her will … but it sure as hell beats last week’s monkey suit. Scores: 8/7/8

6. Kurt / Anna:

Paso Doble to Europe’s The Final Countdown - a truly horrible song. Rocker Brett Michaels showed up during their rehearsal week footage to “help” Kurt become more of a rock-star (but really, to help promote his own new reality show, of course). In the final performance though, Kurt’s weird expressions made him look more like a crazed serial killer. Cranky Len put it best: “You looked awkward doing it, I felt awkward watching it…” Scores: 6/6/6

NOTE: After receiving three low scores of 6′s, dumb Brooke Burke asked her same sad-ass question: “You just got 6′s. How does that feel?” , and Kurt said “Well, obviously, it doesn’t feel good.” You could SO tell he WANTED to say “Well OBVIOUSLY it doesnt feel good… you moron! What kind of question is that?” but of course, he was hypnotized by her balloon boobs and way too tight dress.

7. Brandy / Maksim:

Sigh. During rehearsals for their Tango, overdramatic “pay attention to me” Brandy started crying for no apparent reason and left the room in an emotional huff. After her pointless drama ended, they performed to Bonnie Tyler’s I Need A Hero (which, by the way, is NOT rock and roll, it’s pop music. But whatever. ) The dance was good. Maybe a bit better than good. Yet in another TOTAL overreaction, the judges treated Brandy as if she had just landed on the moon. Len called it the “dance of the night!”, and horny Carrie Anne spewed out some B.S. about how sometimes on this show, “we get to see someone really develop their wings and FLY!” Seriously? OH PLEASE!!! Brooke Burke asked “how does that feel?” after they got their way too high scores: 8/9/9

The show ended this week with a “Rock N Roll Marathon” in which all pairs started out on the dance floor doing famous dances like the twist, the lindy hop, etc – and one by one, they were tapped on the shoulder and asked to leave the dance floor, leaving the strongest couple standing as the winner. The prize for this? Lots of points added to your overall score, which I’m still convinced means absolutely nothing anyway. If it did, Bristol Palin would be gone by now.

Anyway, guess who won the contest? BRANDY!!! Yippee! At this point, I am not sure what will piss me off more: Palin winning the show, or Brandy winning the show. Either way – yuck.

Who Should Have Gone Home: Probably Kurt.

Who DID Go Home: Audrina!!! This was actually quite shocking. First of all, the bottom two were Audrina and Jennifer! Absolutely ridiculous. The judges were angry because they felt neither of them deserved to be there, and horny Carrie Anne tried to backpeddle on her harsh comments to Jennifer the night before. Too late! I do not like Audrina – her face and lack of personality bothers me – but she is a good dancer and definately should not have gone home. I guess it’s back to The Hills for you, lady. How does that feel?

Season 11, Week 6: Round 6 Performances and Results Show (originally aired October 25 and 26, 2010)

For more on Dancing with the Stars, click here.

Mondays at 8/7c, Tuesdays at 9/8c on ABC.

Photographs courtesy of ABC, Adam Larkey.

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Glee Review: Oh, the Horror!

Remember that episode of Head of the Class when the class did Hair?  Dr. Samuels directed, and the very pretty Alex Torres was Claude, and (conveniently) every person in the honors class played a major role in the production, so we got to hear every major musical number from the musical performed in a two-part episode?  That was so much fun.

(Yes, I am aware I am dating myself.  Like Ginni Thomas, I occasionally get nostalgic for events of 20 years ago.)

This week, Glee tore a page out of the Head of the Class playbook, deciding that instead of drawing together a collection of songs (very) loosely premised on a theme, we would instead draw from The Rocky Horror Picture Show.  And, I gotta say, I kinda dug it.

The catalyst is Will’s raging insecurities.  He wants Emma.  Emma wants Carl.  Emma and Carl love The Rocky Horror Picture Show.  So, of course, if Will somehow gets Emma involved in a Glee staging of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, she will fall back in love with him, because nothing says love like trannies in S&M gear.

Of course, we know this won’t work and it’s all an excuse to see Glee get involved in something totally inappropriate for the young’uns.  (Little did the show’s producers know that, thanks to GQ, Lea Michele and Dianna Agron would have already done that for them this week.  Seriously, I haven’t seen anything this porn-y since . . . actual porn.)

Sue goes undercover, working for her station’s managers to get a juicy story so they can expose the “secular progressive agenda” at the school district.  But her sister totally rats her out to Will.  But not until after Will gets the opportunity to play Rocky, which allows him to have a really fun, hot number with Emma which almost makes Emma not an entirely useless character.  Surprisingly, this was actually my favorite number of the episode.  More loose Emma, please.

Carl also got a number, playing the role of Eddie, which allowed John Stamos to show off his Broadway skills.  I’ll take more of that as well.  But later, after learning that Emma got all hot and bothered during her rehearsal with Will, Carl awesomely called Will on stage and in front of his students, accurately accusing Will of doing this whole (completely inappropriate) musical for the sole purpose of stealing his girlfriend.  Boo-yah!

So Will already has tail between his legs when he visits Sue to accuse her of trying to sabotage Glee (for, like, the millionth time).  And Sue gets the speech of the show when she tells Will shame on him for trying to do Rocky Horror in the first place — the school has no business putting the kids front and center in the culture wars.  Will agrees and cancels the show, later confessing his true motivations to Emma.  Meanwhile I wonder if I can get Sue to give the same speech to the adults in Jesus Camp.

Will also tells the students that while they are canceling the show for the public, they can still do it for themselves.  Personally, I really don’t see the point of that, but, hey, it’s always fun to do the time warp again, so I’m not complaining.

On the whole, I think Glee‘s on the up.  This episode along with “Duets” two weeks ago contained actual character growth (Rachel thought about someone other than herself in “Duets,”  Emma actually touches stuff now), and musical numbers that are fun while actually moving the plot forward, which is a relief after the stagnant first three eps of the season.  Disagree?  Let me know in the comments section below!

For another take on this episode, read We Need a Will Schuester Intervention by Stephanie Jaar.

Season 2, Episode 5: The Rocky Horror Glee Show (originally aired October 26, 2010)

For more on Glee, click here.

Tuesdays at 8pm on Fox

Photographs courtesy of Fox and IMDbPro

The Real Housewives of Atlanta Review: A Peak At The Bourghetto

If last week was an all about Kim episode, this week was very Nene and Phaedra centric. I swear it was like watching an episode of House, with Nene as the patient. Never before has plastic surgery been so gripping and heartbreaking! So while Nene showed a little bit of what lay underneath her armor, under the influence but that still counts, Phaedra came off as ignorant and narcissistic. It’s all going fantastically downhill for her. Television gold!

NENE

Though quite beautiful, Nene felt that some liposuction, a breast reduction and a small nose alteration would do wonders for her mind when she’s going through such a hard time with her family. A friend stood by her side from beginning to end, and thankfully, she was there because I didn’t see any housewives waiting in the hospital. Gregg didn’t even show up, which no matter what they were going through, is pretty horrendous for a husband. She also repeatedly called out for her husband when she was going under. He didn’t appear on TV once, and it was evident that he didn’t agree with her decision, but pride does not trump caring for someone enough to support them when they’re going under the knife, electively or not. After the surgery, it broke my heart to watch her reach Kim and Sheree easily but Greg’s phone went to voicemail. If I were Nene, I wouldn’t want to look back at these episodes, slurring phrases like “I’m going to wear your bra” and “I thought you’d bring wine” and also having to watch yourself call out desperately and futilely for your husband. And, where was he lately when she was doing all the parenting?! I’m starting to really hate Greg, a big turnaround from previous seasons.

PHAEDRA & CYNTHIA

The two newbies headed to the Steeplechase, very similar to the Derby. Phaedra was annoying from the first moments that she appeared on screen in her kitchen, bragging about her special “wonderful, blooming peach tea.” Who cares?! Then, she couldn’t convince Apollo to go with her so she brought Dwight instead. This didn’t make Cynthia’s boyfriend Peter too happy since he was the odd man out. Then to through salt in his wounds, Phaedra started going on and on about how she couldn’t deal with a man who had baby mamas. Peter happens to have five children, though the number of baby mamas remains unknown. He was offended as I would have been too. She basically went off on a ridiculous diatribe about his life circumstances and how much her ex-con husband is still cleaner than men like him because Apollo has no baggage like that. I’d love to really hear her explain the definition of baggage. One horrible ex can be considered baggage. What would 5 years in jail be considered?! Cynthia showed some personality in all her mocking of Phaedra and her narcissism. Yes, she bragged about her job, what school she graduated from and how many degrees she had. So Cynthia went to town. She’s officially growing on me. Now if she’d just go ahead and marry this successful man who magically managed to hold his temper the entire outing. Seriously, brava Peter! Still, Cynthia attended Phaedra’s overly ornate baby shower which looked more like a wedding, from the Dwight-Phaedra ballroom dance to to the dozen ridiculous white flowers in Phaedra’s hair, to the freaking ballerina. And I can’t forget the dress code of hats and gloves. It showed me that Cynthia can set drama aside, so that’s another plus in my book. All the other ladies attended as well, and even Lisa showed her face, looking as beautiful as ever. 

KIM & KANDI

Kim’s parents came into town, and a lot of things became clear about what made Kim…well Kim. Dad likes to drink and seemed ay-okay with Big Poppa’s extramarital affairs as long as they also get an invite to one of his two hot tubs. At this point, Big Poppa has returned to Kim’s life which she feels means they’re destined to be together. Funny, how she’s not saying that to Kroy Biermann nowadays. Kim’s parents were charged with organizing Arianna’s baptism, but no church will take her since Kim hadn’t attended in decades. This is probably a good thing seeing as Kim is a self-proclaimed adulterer! Moments later dad coined her a “class individual” and a professional in response to her White Party performance on YouTube. I’d be excited to hear what he has to say after watching her harass her assistant and multiple gay men in that same episode.

Kim is also ready for her next single to be created out of thin air for her, titled “The Ring Don’t Mean A Thing,” and she wanted some help. Of course, she won’t sing or explain at all what she envisions in that crazy head of hers, but at least Kandi’s not going to do this one for free. Kandi also had an idea about going on tour with Kim to promote her new album since she’s putting the finishing touches on it. I don’t really get it. When Kandi phrases this tour as her idea, it’s genius, but last week, it was all about the laughs. Is she just playing smart, riding the coattails since Kim is “musically” hotter than you at the moment? (Wow, did I put Kim, music and hot in the same sentence?!)

SHEREE

Sheree followed through with her promise to go on a second date with Tiy-E, aka the Love Doctor, though it was quite the informal one. He invited her to one of his seminars on love and relationships then placed her up on stage with a few other random girls to question her about her own views and opinions on relationships. I liked that he was challenging her, in a positive way. I’ve gotten to see a more mature side of Sheree that doesn’t seem so petty. I guess that’s what happens when you aren’t the most conceited or villainous person on the show. Thanks, Phaedra! Still, she made it clear that love and money are equal when it comes to importance, and she also doesn’t find herself meeting many men who are broke because she doesn’t end up in the same places. I assume those places are anything having to do with public transportation, libraries or jail. See, she’s still Sheree.

What’d you think about this week? Yay or nay for plastic surgery? Isn’t Cynthia making a name for herself, outside her looks and based on her personality, fantastic? More important, would you buy tickets to a Kim & Kandi tour?

QUOTABLES

“Do you sleep with a dollar bill?” – Kim / “No, but the house that you sleep in cost dollar bills, so…” – Kandi

“A clean man? Apollo taking showers in prison is the only way that he could be cleaner than my man.” – Cynthia

“With those matching pink hats, Phaedra looked like a black Tammy Faye Baker and Dwight looked like Willy Wonka. – Cynthia

“If I had gotten plastic surgery every time I had marital problems, I would look like Dwight.” – Sheree

“Someone stab me in the neck and put me out of my misery.” – Cynthia

“Bourghetto. Bourgee (aka bourgeois) and ghetto at the same time.” – Kandi

Season 3, Episode 4: Petty Boughetto (originally aired October 25, 2010)

For more on the Real Housewives of Atlanta, click here.

Mondays at 9pm on Bravo

Photographs courtesy of Bravo and Wilford Harewood.

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