Survivor Review: To the Victor Go the Craftsman Tools

I’ve had this thought many times before and watching Survivor: Redemption Island this week brought it to mind again: whoever found Russell Hantz to originally compete on Survivor deserves a raise. On a show with a great reputation for characters that are larger than life and borderline ridiculous, he still manages to stand out. And that’s just damn impressive.

BUT…after making it to the finals in his other two seasons on the show, the Zapatera tribe broke tradition and voted Russell out to Redemption Island last week where his fate would be left to a challenge with Matt. And of course, Russell handles this news like a mature adult by expressing his desire to bitch slap every one of them. Winning.

When it comes time for the challenge of setting up dominoes (has it really come to that?) the dreamy pre-med student, Matt, prevails for the second week in a row and officially sends Russell home. If you think Russell handles this well you’d be wrong. He begins weeping like a little girl and its embarrassing. Not to be completely outdone though, Russell goes out by stirring up as much crap as he can by provoking hillbilly Ralph in the stands to reveal that he has a hidden immunity idol. Ralph almost whips it out (NOT like that…even though we wouldn’t be able to see anything past his monstrous amounts of chest hair) but thinks better of it at the last minute and tries to play it off like he was faking.

And this where Russell’s replacement in the lunatic department enters: Phillip. Here we have a wonderfully bizarre man that CBS labels as ‘Former Federal Agent?’ in his lower third. Phillip proclaims that he knows Ralph is lying and intends to use this information to his benefit later in the game. Isn’t it cute how he thinks he’ll get far enough to use information like that?

Anyhow – Russell is officially gone for the season so we turn our attention back to the Ometepe and Zapatera tribes as they continue to align themselves together and ostracize a few stragglers. The Zapatera tribe is particularly feisty as they already have two tribe members designated for dismissal for previously aligning themselves with Russell: Krista and Stephanie. These two soon-to-be-voted-out girls also have the distinction of being the only ones on the tribe not knowing that Ralph has found the hidden immunity idol. Sorry girls!

The Ometepe tribe is slightly more fun to watch though thanks to the antics of Phillip who prances around in disgustingly old pink underwear and irritates as many people as possible. And then there’s Boston Rob who up to his usual tricks by creating a diversion with a day of fun and games on the beach so he can sneak off to the look for the hidden immunity idol. At first it seems like his effort will be wasted when we see him frantically hacking at every tree on the island, but sure enough – he finds it and unlike Ralph, wisely keeps his find to himself.

At the reward and immunity challenge the two tribes compete in a series of obstacles involving a plethora of advertising for Craftsman Tools. There is lot of running, chopping, digging, sawing, cutting and nailing with Jeff Probst shouting his unusual brand of encouragement mixed with disdain. The competition is close but Zapatera wins and Ralph crows their victory not unlike a character you might see on Deliverance.

As the Ometepe tribe prepares for tribal council it becomes clear that the vote is going to come down against either crazy Phillip or Kristina who Boston Rob allows everyone to think might have the hidden immunity idol. Rob sees Kristina as the bigger threat down the line but everyone else leans to removing Phillip simply for the obnoxious factor. This is where we remember how good Rob is at this because after a fairly underwhelming tribal council discussion they end up sending Kristina to Redemption Island in a 4 – 3 vote. It is there that she will take on Matt next week for her chance to stay in the game.

It’s pretty early on to make any predictions about who will win but my gut tells me the winner will come from the Zapatera tribe. Sadly I’m not basing this on any real facts but rather my strong desire to see Mike stay in the game as long possible. He’s a damn treat to look at and as a veteran deserves all of the Craftsman Tools that a deserted island has to offer. Go Mike!

Survivor: Redemption Island Season 22, Episode 4: “Don’t You Work For Me?” (originally aired March 9, 2011)

Survivor airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on CBS.

Images courtesy of CBS.