The Real Housewives of New Jersey Review: It’s a Gorga Christmas and You Better Come Correct
July 19, 2011 by Ash Z.
Filed under Television
After a week hiatus, the RHONJ are back and everyone is getting ready for Christmas. Rich is stepping up to show Cousin Kathy he’s a man by hiring people to hang lights all over this house. Joe and Melissa are throwing a massive Christmas party costing $50,000, and Teresa is trying to reign in holiday spending because they are bankrupt (but that didn’t keep them from buying a 30 foot tree for their living room).
The main event this week is the Gorga Christmas party. A fabulous affair complete with a Melissa and Joe ice sculpture, a step & repeat (you know, those little billboards all celebrities pose in front of when entering parties?), and gambling tables trading only “Gorga Money,” currency plastered with Joe and Melissa’s faces. Who said this party was celebrating Jesus’ birthday? We’re here to recognize all things Gorga!
While the Gorgas prepare their home for the big party, Teresa and Joe seem less than thrilled to attend. Especially Joe whose thinking “FML” as Teresa prods him to get ready for the affair. A personal highlight is Joe showing Teresa how he’ll drop kick anyone who talks smack to him at the party. He put all five foot two inches of himself into that kick. Nice going, Joe Guidice.
The unnecessary violent threat of the evening comes from Cousin Kathy’s husband Rich. As Kathy complains about Teresa being mean to her at the party (Teresa was acting like a “B,” but is that really a surprise to anyone these days?), Rich throws down by proclaiming, “I’ll burn this whole f***ing place down” and “f*** that b*****!” If hiring folks to hang Christmas lights didn’t cement Rich Wakile’s status as a man, his parade of “F” bombs, five to be exact, definitely did.
Adding to the drama is Melissa’s brother-in-law who decides the best place to ask Joe Guidice for the thousand dollars Joe owes him is the Gorga Christmas party. To Joe’s credit, he refrains from drop kicking his ass but you can see by the redness in his face and the bulging veins in his neck, we’ve reached threat level orange.
Next, add crazy Kim G. into the mix. She decides to bring Monica Chacon as her date to the Christmas party. Monica is one of the attorneys suing Joe and Teresa for all their money so you know when she walks in the door, we’ll be on the verge of Armageddon. Of course, squirrely Kim G. is aware of all this which is why she brings Monica to the party in the first place. She wants to see a fight…who doesn’t, really? As soon as Teresa learns of Monica’s presence, she demands Monica leave. Melissa and Joe graciously kick her out to avoid any drama. But, judging from the teaser for next week’s episode, there’s still more in store.
Until next week, folks!
Season 4, Episode 9: Twas The Fight Before Christmas (originally aired July 17, 2011)
Images courtesy of Bravo TV.
