America’s Next Top Model All-Stars Review: Float Like A Goddess, Sink Like A Tree

Last night was the finale of America’s Next Top Model: All-Stars and the many outcomes and dramatic reveals did not disappoint. Getting to the end of the episode was almost downright unbelievable! Before I totally blow it and uncontrollably blurt out the ending, let’s go through the whirlwind of challenges that the models had to endure one last time.

The first Tyra mail of the finale brought a teasing message in Crete’s native tongue of Greek with the famous Covergirl slogan, “Easy, breezy, beautiful.” If you know anything about Top Model, then you know for years Tyra has been handing out Covergirl makeup campaigns to the ANTM winners cycle after cycle so, of course, this Tyra mail signaled it was time to push a little makeup like your life depended on it. Paige Cali, the communication director for Covergirl, sat in on the photo shoots and commercials that each model performed while Jay Manuel coached them. The Shadowblast eye shadow still photos shot by Nikos Papadopoulos were super important being that the winner’s photo would eventually become a national print ad. We’re already aware that each of these girls can take a mean photo, so the photo shoot was a breeze (or should I utilize “breezy” here?) but the Covergirl commercials are always the real challenge. Year after year, I cringe at the botched lines, vacant stares, and painfully awkward outtakes of the models’ Covergirl makeup commercials, one of which is dreadfully destined to become an actual national television advertisement. Lisa is a born performer but her Shadowblast speech fell a little flat, even with an “oh, yea!” being thrown in there from time to time. Allison’s poor, photosensitive eyes, the one feature that makes her unique to her competitors, became her downfall once again. Jay improvised by having her stand in further shaded areas along with a few closed eye shots which turns out kind of worked since the ad was selling “eye couture” after all. Angelea managed to shoot a smooth commercial and added her own personal flavor to the mix. I have to say, this was the easiest commercial shoot to watch of any cycle yet.

With Covergirl done and out of the way, the next step to breathing easier for each of the ladies was to shoot the Vogue Italia spread. Valentina Serra, a stylist for Vogue Italia, joined the models on a remote beach in Crete to shoot each possible winner’s feature piece. No sooner were they done with their Vogue shoot did they have yet another Tyra mail waiting for them; the last message ever in their all-star cycle.

The final runway show challenge was finally upon them and, to help support the three finalists onstage, past cycle competitors Laura, Shannon, and Dominique were welcomed back, along with some local Greek models for extra backup. The dresses that the remaining three designed a few episodes ago with designer Michael Cinco were no longer sketches on paper. Each of the girls would be wearing their personal creations out on the runway at the goddess themed show all while strutting to their own personally created songs from the past music challenge.

This was one of the most hectic runway shows that Tyra and her team have concocted yet so let’s see if I can even begin to explain this properly. One model would start out at the beginning of the Greek temple themed stage where a very decent sized pool of water awaited them. Each model would swim (underwater) across the pool to a set of stairs where they would rise from the water to begin their “transformation” from mortal to goddess. Here, they’d step into a circular curtain ring that would rise up, giving the model time to escape through the back and trade places with another model who would then, adorned in beautiful goddess inspired couture, would be mounted into a harness and lifted delicately from the circle to the runway where they’d finally strut their stuff down the catwalk. Whew, ok, still with me?

Each of the three remaining girls had a chance to both swim, race back stage, and then be redressed in their Cinco design and hoisted onstage to do their final runway walk. Lisa was the first up to take a swim but became disoriented and wound up hitting the side wall of the pool. Not really the way to kick off a show but she sucked it up and continued as if nothing happened and in that situation, that’s all you can really do. Her goddess walk showed off her personal pizzazz and you wouldn’t expect anything less from Lisa. Allison hit the water with no problems but her runway walk was still a little ridged. Perhaps it was a bit difficult for her because of that pesky God of Wind that showed up and almost blew her offstage while trying to send her dress flying up over her head. Angelea had, surprise, surprise, a mini-breakdown before the show from all of the pressure and the apparent fact that she can’t swim probably added to that. While she wasn’t the most graceful mortal in the water, when she finally transformed to Angelea the Goddess, her walk clearly let the crowd know that she was here!

The girls later kissed Greece goodbye and it was back to Los Angeles where the final judging panel awaited them. So part one of the crazy, crazy, and unbelievable news was announced with no hesitation. According to the network and ANTM producers, “something was learned” about Angelea after the show that disqualified her completely from the all-star competition! All of the work that she did, everything she put herself through, her determination to make something of herself, and making it to the ANTM finale is now all down the drain! But what was the big secret? Just like me, I’m sure the majority of Top Model fans out there clogged up the Google search engine, desperate for information. The entire debacle ended up with Angelea trending majorly on Twitter last night but still left us with a lot of unanswered questions. Word on the street is that Ang may have jumped the gun and made a premature Facebook post on who the remaining three models were before the airing date and possibly even who the winner was. I guess for now, we just won’t know.

Well, with two ladies remaining, I can’t help but feel that the winner of the competition is somewhat shadowed by the news of Angelea. However, if you were rooting for Allison or Lisa, you’ll still be pretty satisfied. A lengthy judging process took place as Team Tyra went through each Covergirl shot, Covergirl commercial and entire portfolio from the season. Part two of the motion editorial, Modelland, was shown at the finale and, as Tyra had mentioned last week, the last de-masked girl of the reel would be the winner. Two nervous and deserving ladies waited impatiently and watched as Lisa was revealed at the end.

Each of the remaining three had their reasons for thinking they deserved to be an all-star, whether it was their need to rise above their tough upbringing or wanting to leave behind their childhood abuse. Angelea, Lisa, and Allison were all top contenders any way you look at it and this ultimately translated to each girl becoming an obvious threat to one another. Lisa was able to take those perceived threats and use it to climb to the top and really develop her brand. Lisa is a tough contender, a vivid performer, and an all-around all-star.

Cycle 17, Episode 13: All-Star Finale (originally aired December 7, 2011)

Images courtesy of Walter Sassard/The CW.