When we last left off, Chuck ran away from his feelings, Serena wanted to be a part of B.A. (Buenos Aires, Big Apple), Rufus and Lily have a love child, and Nate and Vanessa are notably absent from this episode.  What a way to start a new year!  Everyone returns after winter recess and try to go back to life as they want it to be: Blair wants to join up with the Colony Club ladies, Jenny’s going back to school, and Chuck is getting high with a Thai hooker named Bo–at least until Uncle Jack (no, not him) brings him back to New York.  And in Brooklyn, Rufus is lying to Dan about where he’s been: knocking on adoption agency doors in Boston looking for his child.

While Jenny and Eric flit about the Upper East Side trying to put the kibosh on Penelope & Co. tormenting Nelly Yuki, Serena tells Dan she dumped Aaron (thank you!) and now she and Dan are back together.  Per Gossip Girl, this is the third time for them, and I’m hopeful this will last as the characters are more enjoyable when they’re not being weird about how weird it is not to be together.

And speaking of being weird together, Blair still cares for Chuck but he’s too high to care.  So high that Headmistress Queller catches Chuck rocking the ganja in the hallway.  Chuck explains that it’s only hash (which is legal, right?) but Blair and Jack have to bail Chuck out of trouble.  Chuck thanks them all by going for lap dances at Victrola and throwing a party to celebrate being the dirt bag his late father said he was.  When Blair challenges him, he tells her to lose her delusions about him; she leaves to win the hearts and judgmental stares of the Colony ladies, but with Dorota’s menacing glare, Blair realizes she shouldn’t throw Chuck, Serena, and Lily under the bus and runs over the Colony ladies on her way back to see Chuck.

In the adult section of the show, Rufus and Lily bicker over her unwillingness to help Rufus locate their child.  She drops that Chuck knows about the child (a boy) but that he will keep her secret safe.  (Uh huh.)  In Rufus’s frustration, he is not pleased that Dan and Serena are back together and he all but throws Serena out of the loft.  This only raises the suspicions of Dan who searches the loft and finds a Boston map with adoption agency numbers on it.  He confronts Rufus and Rufus shows he’s a bad liar.

Our stories converge at Victrola where, after Chuck and Eric share a moment of step-brotherly kinship, Chuck tells Dan about Rufus’s love child with Lily.  Dan takes Serena outside to tell her about their half-brother.  Blair arrives in time to realize Chuck went up to the roof to drink and dance dangerously on the edge.  She and Jack run up to the roof to stop Chuck from jumping/falling.  (Query: Is this the first time Chuck has been on a roof when he didn’t try to sexually assault someone?)  They talk him down as Jack takes custody of Chuck and asks Blair to trust him.  Blair does but drops a cryptic note that Chuck can’t know about New Years . . . whatever that means.

Rufus goes to see Lily and she agrees to join Rufus on the quest to find their child.  After a quick call from Rufus stops Dan from spoiling the surprise, Lily and Dan drive off, or rather they watch her driver do it.

So what a slow episode this week!  Although, we saw this earlier this season as the show got back in the swing of things.  It recovered from the slow start in East Hampton and I’m sure we’ll get the same here, especially when next week’s show features the reading of Bart’s will.  Will our dramatic Chuck Bass return?  Let’s hope.

Season 2, Episode 14: In the Realm of Basses (originally aired January 5, 2009)

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Hey, have you heard of this Tina Fey chick?  No?  Used to work at Saturday Night Live.  Has these great Amex commercials.  Just won a bunch of Emmys for her work on this little show nobody watches, and, I don’t know if you know this, but there’s this whole election thing going on, which really, the media should cover a little more, don’t you think?  And Tina Fey does this spot on impression of Sarah Palin.  You should really look into it.  And start watching 30 Rock already!

And so: A cute and matching Liz Lemon strolls through Rockefeller Plaza as if she were modeling for Kohls.  She runs into Jack, who announces he’s back from D.C. and here to get his old job back.  She announces that she has a home evaluation today from an adoption agency.  Is this adopt-a-baby week?  For the sake of the show, I hope she doesn’t get it.  The only things worse than child actors are baby actors.  Liz has taken a number of steps to insure that she makes the right impression on the adoption agent, including the matchy-matchy outfit and removing all of her Colin Firth movies.  And just as Liz says, “There is no chance that I’m blowing this,” we know that the exact opposite is going to happen.  Let’s see how!

Jack meets Banks, aka GOB, in Jack’s old office.  Jack offers his assistance, and Banks says the only assistance he and Kathy Geiss need is “deciding which John Mayer song to do ‘it’ to.”  Kathy, meanwhile, sits at Jack’s desk, enamored by her soap operas, surrounded by posters of Mark Wahlberg and unicorns.  She nearly rips Banks’ arm off when he tries to distract her.  Jack says word is out that Banks is driving the company to ruin.  For some reason, Banks concedes and offers Jack a job…in the mailroom.  Jack accepts, willing to work his way back up.  Estimated time to the top: 9 years.

In the studio halls, Tracy boasts about the financial success of his new porn video game, and Jenna unsuccessfully demands restitution for her help.  At Liz’s home evaluation, Megan Mullally appears as Bev, the adoption agent.  She interrogates Liz, and since Liz works 60-80 hour weeks, Bev thinks it’s a good idea for her to check out the workplace.  Awesome.

Jack delivers a Soap Opera Digest to Kathy, then offers to help shoulder her company responsibilities.  She responds by feeling up his leg.  Which … well, who knows?  Maybe I’d go that route with Jack Donaghy too, opportunity given.  No judging!  Finally, Jack understands the kind of help she’s looking for.  “Uh oh” is right, sir.

Liz enters the Writer’s Room and demands that everyone act appropriately while the agent is visiting.  Movie Party Thursday is nixed.  Jenna complains to Liz about Tracy’s unwillingness to reimburse those who worked on his video game, and Liz lies a little more that Tracy was planning something.  It’s nice to see not much has changed.

Later, Jack corners Liz and confesses that Kathy touched him in his “swimsuit area” and “it’s not at all erotic and fun like when men do it to women.”  He must now consider the possibility of sleeping his way to the top.  And is it me, or is Alec Baldwin’s hair really…tall and long?  What’s up with that?

The Green Room becomes a nursery and Liz convinces Tracy to buy gifts for his voice actors.  Jack runs into Banks in Central Park, and Banks reveals he’s planning on shutting the company down for two years in order to double profits.  Back at 30 Rock, Bev begins her evaluation by interviewing members of the staff.  You can imagine how well this goes, i.e., not at all.  Jack swings by to tell Liz that there’s only one way to save the company: He’s headed upstairs to “doink” Kathy Geiss, with a serious pelvic thrust to emphasize the “doink.”

Tracy returns with gifts, including a set of solid gold nunchucks for Frank, which will only be used for good.  Banks strolls in unexpectedly, so Liz rushes to interrupt Jack and Kathy.  Jack laments what his life has turned into and how hard he’s worked to reach the top, for it to now hinge on “how far [he's] willing to go with a woman in Dora the Explorer panties that were clearly made for an obese child.”  Liz suggests that maybe Kathy isn’t looking for nookie, but for attention.  She says soap operas aren’t about sex, and clearly, Liz and I watch soaps for different reasons.  Bev interrupts them, and things go badly at the fake nursery.  Ultimately, Jack pulls Bev aside to distract her, and enter Kathy Geiss!  She tackles Bev, Jack yelling that they’re just friends.  Bev escapes, running right into Frank’s swinging solid gold nunchucks, knocking her unconscious.

Before Bev wakes up, Liz sneaks a peek at the “Unsatisfactory” evaluation form.  No baby!  Bev comes to, with no memory of the last few hours.  Liz decides a medical checkup can wait – she gets a do-over!  Quickly, she assembles the staff for a new round of interviews, and Jack runs upstairs to give Kathy “the full soap opera.”  The second time around, the interviews go almost perfectly.  But Bev says that as a single mom in a non-traditional work environment, this won’t work and Liz is denied.  Liz gives an impassioned speech which causes Bev to reconsider.  Success!  And then Bev re-introduces herself again, with no memory of the last hour.  Finally, Liz gives up and sends her to the hospital.

Jonathan appears, needing Liz upstairs to stop Jack from sacrificing his virtue to Kathy.  Liz bursts into the office just in time.  She and Jack dramatically improvise a soap opera scene that includes disappearances, twins, and a guy named Patch.  Kathy believes it and loves it, Jack gets hired, and GE is saved!

Outside in Rockefeller Plaza, Jack runs into Banks and informs him of his new position as Kathy’s private advisor.  Banks replies that he’s already made provisions for his financial future.  Which means launching himself into oncoming traffic and suing.

Back in his office, Liz stops by to visit, dressed down again in sweatshirt and jeans.  Thank goodness.  As she leaves, she peeks back in, and tells Jack what everyone at home is thinking: “I just like seeing you in there.”

Yes, there have been many better episodes of 30 Rock, but as a season opener, this one works just fine.  Still entertaining, still funny, it at least proves that the writing hasn’t lost its touch, and will only get better from here.  Welcome back, 30 Rock!  You’ve been missed!

And keep your eye on that Tina Fey lady.  I hear she’s really hot right now.

Season 3, Episode 1: Do-Over (originally aired October 30, 2008)

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